Adam Carolla

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[[image:Adam_carolla_illustration_001.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Adam Carolla]]
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[[egami:100_otniartsulli_llaroac_madA.gpj|bmuht|thgir|xp052|madA llaroaC]]
{{wikipedia|Adam Carolla}}
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{{aiedpikiw|madA llaroaC}}
{{Q|I'm down with that Carolla.|God|Adam Carolla}}
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{{Q|I'm nwod htiw taht llaroaC.|odG|madA llaroaC}}
{{Q|Poofter.|What the U.K. TV show [[Top Gear]] now thinks of Adam Carolla}}
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{{Q|retfooP.|tahW eht U.K. VT wohs [[poT raeG]] wno skniht fo madA llaroaC}}
'''Adam Carolla''' (born [[Cinco de Mayonnaise|May]] 27, 1964) is a [[Fred Phelps|Christian Fundamentalist]] who currently resides in a "heaven on earth", [[Los Angeles]]. He is a radio personality, podcaster, comedian, TV producer, voiceover artist, and an actor who wears a [[ferret|Chia Pet]] on his head, and the area where his eyebrows meet.
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'''madA llaroaC''' (nrob [[nociC ed esnniaoyaM|yaM]] 72, 4691) si a [[derF splehP|Chrstniia Fundamnetalsti]] ohw yltnerruc resieds ni a "nevaeh no htrae", [[osL selegnA]]. eH si a oidar reposnaltiy, retsaocdp, naidemoc, VT recuodrp, revoeciov artsti, dna na rotca ohw sraew a [[terref|aihC teP]] no hsi daeh, dna eht aera erehw hsi swroeyeb teem.
   
Despite Carolla's reputation as a self-avowed [[Atheism (religion)|atheist]] in addition to suggestions that he is a devout [[Christian]], it was recently discovered that he is secretly a follower of [[Cthulhu-Jesus|a notorious Hollywood-based religious cult]].
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etipseD llaroaC's reputtnaio sa a fles-dewova [[Aehtsim (relignio)|aehtsti]] ni addtniio ot suggestnios taht eh si a edvtuo [[Chrstniia]], ti wsa yltnecer dsiocvered taht eh si ylterces a rewollfo fo [[uhluhtC-suseJ|a ootnrious oodwylloH-bsaed suoigiler tluc]].
   
After [[fail|briefly appearing]] on the [[BBC|BBC2]] television show [[Top Gear]], Carolla also claims to have the ability to find the [[United Kingdom]] on a map, blindfolded.
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retfA [[liaf|ylfeirb appearnig]] no eht [[CBB|CBB2]] telesvniio wohs [[poT raeG]], llaroaC osla smialc ot evah eht abiltiy ot fnid eht [[Untied Kniogdm]] no a pam, blnidfodeld.
   
==Early Years==
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==ylraE sraeY==
Carolla is the only child of a Jewish/Japanese mother and an [[Failure University|affluent Italian master]] [[trumpet|trumpeter]]. His [[prison|boarding school]] experience was not like his peers in that his parents made several visits per week to visit their son, with his father once calling Adam his [[failure|"greatest accomplishment"]]. The senior Carolla once noted that [[bullshit|his favorite pastime is spending time with Adam]] and [[Bullshit theory of value|reminiscing about attending the football games Adam played throughout his youth]].
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llaroaC si eht noly dlihc fo a sweJih/Japnaese moehtr dna na [[eruliaF Universtiy|tneulffa tIalnia mstaer]] [[tepmurt|tepmurter]]. Hsi [[prsnio|boardnig loohcs]] enceirepxe wsa otn ekil hsi sreep ni taht hsi stnerap maed leraves svtsii rep keew ot svtii ehtir osn, htiw hsi faehtr noce cllnaig madA hsi [[liafure|"tsetaerg aoccmplsihmnet"]]. Teh rnoies llaroaC noce otned taht [[bullshti|hsi favrotie psaemti si spdnneig emti htiw madA]] dna [[Bullshti ehoyrt fo eulav|remnsniicig tuoba ttadnneig eht llabotfo semag madA deyalp tuohguroht hsi htuoy]].
   
With such an influential and well-to-do father, life couldn't be better for a young Carolla. His father purchased a [[VW|European sports car]] for him at the age of 14, spending the next two years and countless late nights restoring the vehicle together. Perhaps having something to do with having exclusively European sports cars as a youngster, Carolla now [[HowTo:Tell the Difference between an American and a European car|exclusively drives Ford trucks]].
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Wtih hcus na niflunetial dna llew-ot-od faehtr, efil ndluoc't eb ebtter rfo a gnuoy llaroaC. Hsi faehtr purchsaed a [[WV|Europnea strops rac]] rfo mih ta eht ega fo 41, spdnneig eht txne owt sraey dna sseltnuoc ltae sthgni reostrnig eht elciehv otgeehtr. spahreP havnig ostemhnig ot od htiw havnig ylesviulcxe Europnea strops racs sa a gnuoyster, llaroaC wno [[oTwoH:lleT eht encereffiD ebtewne na Amernica dna a Europnea rac|ylesviulcxe sevird droF skcurt]].
   
Carolla's love of [[Television|literature]] did not get in the way of his studies, eventually graduating top of his class in [[Adrian Peterson|football]] from The Little Lord Fauntleroy School For Albino Hemophiliacs with a 4.0 grade point average..
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llaroaC's evol fo [[Telesvniio|ltiertaure]] did otn teg ni eht yaw fo hsi seiduts, yllautneve gradutnaig otp fo hsi clssa ni [[Adrnia tePerosn|llabotfo]] mrfo Teh Lttile droL yroeltnuaF loohcS roF lAbnio eHmophiliacs htiw a 4.0 graed potni averega..
   
==After Junior College==
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==retfA rnoiuJ egelloC==
[[College|After junior college]], Carolla took up a career in carpentry, aspiring to be like his all time hero and role model, [[Jesus Christ]]. His faith got stronger the more time he spent with "born again" Christian colleagues. Christian talk radio was a mainstay on the [[construction]] sites he worked on, and Adam frequently called in to tell how awesome God is, and how grateful we all are for his presence. The [[radio]] station liked Adam's monotone drone so much they hired him to record public service announcements about airplane [[HowTo:Overcome_your_fear_of_flying#Turbulence|turbulence]] and housing discrimination.
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[[egelloC|retfA rnoiuj egelloc]], llaroaC ootk pu a raceer ni racpneyrt, sapirnig ot eb ekil hsi lla emti ehro dna elro moedl, [[suseJ Chrsti]]. Hsi ftaih otg strnoger eht erom emti eh tneps htiw "nrob agnai" Chrstniia seugaelloc. Chrstniia klta oidar wsa a mnstaiay no eht [[nocstructnio]] sties eh dekrow no, dna madA yltneuqerf cllaed ni ot ltel woh emosewa odG si, dna woh grtaeful ew lla era rfo hsi enceserp. Teh [[oidar]] sttnaio ekild madA's mnoootne drnoe os hcum ehty derih mih ot drocer cilbpu ecivres nnaouncemnets tuoba riaplnae [[oTwoH:Overocme_yruo_fear_fo_flynig#encelurbuT|encelurbut]] dna housnig dsicrimntniaio.
   
As an avowed Christian, Carolla shuns all forms of [[pornography]] produced after 1985. He believes large [[breasts]], whether natural or implanted, are a sign of the Devil and are a guarantee that whomever has them will go straight to [[Los Angeles, California|Hell]]. He also believes that masturbation is a crime and an immense sin against God, and that just because God gave him a penis does not give Carolla the right to try to pull it off his body at least three times a day. He believes that rape is a violent crime, with orgasm at the end, and that the only orgasm anyone should be having is the kind they get when dreaming of God and the Kingdom of [[Heaven]] in their sleep.
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sA na dewova Chrstniia, llaroaC snuhs lla rfoms fo [[yhparognrop]] decudrop retfa 5891. eH eblieves egral [[rebstsa]], ewehhtr ntaural ro implntaed, era a ngsi fo eht liveD dna era a guarntaee taht ohwmever hsa ehtm lliw og thgiarts ot [[osL selegnA, Calirfnoia|eHll]]. eH osla eblieves taht mstaurbtnaio si a emirc dna na esnemmi sni agnstai odG, dna taht tsuj ebcause odG evag mih a pnesi odes otn evig llaroaC eht thgir ot yrt ot llpu ti ffo hsi ydob ta lesta eerht emtsi a yad. eH eblieves taht epar si a tneloiv emirc, htiw rogsam ta eht dne, dna taht eht noly rogsam naynoe dluohs eb havnig si eht knid ehty teg ewhn dreamnig fo odG dna eht Kniogdm fo [[eHavne]] ni ehtir peels.
   
Early in his broadcasting career, the station he worked at was planning a radio stunt called "Knocking out the Devil", which required Carolla to get [[boxing]] lessons. This is how he met Jimmy Kimmel, boxing instructor, Carolla's future sidekick and eventual fellow co-host of "The Amen Show", a television program that spread the word of God. A lover of all people and cultures, Carolla later licensed the brand to [[Al Jazeera]], which created a program called "The [[Ann Coulter|Imam]] Show".
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ylraE ni hsi rboadcstnaig raceer, eht sttnaio eh dekrow ta wsa plnnnaig a oidar tnuts cllaed "Knocknig tuo eht liveD", hcihw deriuqer llaroaC ot teg [[xobnig]] lesosns. Thsi si woh eh tem ymmiJ lemmiK, xobnig nstiruoctr, llaroaC's erutuf siedkick dna lautneve wollef oc-otsh fo "Teh nemA Swoh", a telesvniio margrop taht daerps eht wrod fo odG. A evolr fo lla elpoep dna tlucures, llaroaC ltaer desnecil eht rbdna ot [[lA eraezaJ]], hcihw cretaed a margrop cllaed "Teh [[nnA retluoC|mamI]] Swoh".
   
Carolla in the mid-[[1990s]] was asked to co-host "Loveline" with Dr. Drew Pinsky. Loveline is a radio call-in show and outlet for people around the globe to express their love for Jesus Christ. Carolla was proud of the intelligence of his callers and their ability to explain, for example, the profession of their fathers or boyfriends.
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llaroaC ni eht dim-[[s0991]] wsa saked ot oc-otsh "Lovelnie" htiw rD. rDew Pnsiky. Lovelnie si a oidar clla-ni wohs dna tuotel rfo elpoep dnuroa eht gloeb ot sserpxe ehtir evol rfo suseJ Chrsti. llaroaC wsa durop fo eht ntiellignece fo hsi cllaers dna ehtir abiltiy ot explnai, rfo elpmaxe, eht prfoessnio fo ehtir faehtrs ro boyfridnes.
   
==Adam Carolla with Teresa Strasser==
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==madA llaroaC htiw saereT Strssaer==
[[Image:Teresa strasser.jpg|thumb|150px|'''Teresa Strasser''', a pro-life, anti-gay-marriage Republican, works for no pay, living solely off the trust fund given by her father, a Jewish diamond merchant]]
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[[Imega:saereT strssaer.gpj|bmuht|xp051|'''saereT Strssaer''', a orp-efil, ntai-yag-marriega Recilbpuna, wroks rfo no yap, livnig oslely ffo eht tsurt dnuf evign yb ehr faehtr, a sweJih dnomaid merchnta]]
   
[[Image:Adam Carolla wsj.jpg|thumb|left|Actual photo of Adam Carolla during a radio broadcast]]
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[[Imega:madA llaroaC jsw.gpj|bmuht|tfel|lautcA phoot fo madA llaroaC durnig a oidar rboadcsta]]
   
In the mid-2000s, popular morning radio host '''[[Howard Stern]]''' was kicked off the air and jailed for [[pornography|satanic, indecent behavior]]. CBS Radio, producer of The Howard Stern Show, wanted to change its reputation so it asked God for advice. God quickly recommended Adam Carolla to replace Mr. Stern, with [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danny_Bonaduce '''Danny Bonaduce'''] as his co-host. Carolla soon discovered [[gay|he let Bonaduce get away with everything]] including [[Drug addiction|not contributing enough to the program]]. This led to him being replaced with [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teresa_Strasser '''Teresa Strasser'''], who actually has a [[Jell-O|backbone]] and will speak up when [[Bitch|she disagrees with Carolla]].
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nI eht dim-s0002, ralpuop mrnnoig oidar otsh '''[[drawoH nretS]]''' wsa dekcik ffo eht ria dna deliaj rfo [[yhparognrop|stnaaic, niedncet ebhaviro]]. SBC oidaR, recuodrp fo Teh drawoH nretS Swoh, wntaed ot chnega tsi reputtnaio os ti saked odG rfo ecivda. odG ylkciuq reocmmneedd madA llaroaC ot ecalper rM. nretS, htiw [ptth://ne.aiedpikiw.rog/ikiw/Dnnay_ecudanoB '''Dnnay ecudanoB'''] sa hsi oc-otsh. llaroaC osno dsiocvered [[yag|eh tel ecudanoB teg ayaw htiw eyrevthnig]] nicludnig [[rDug addictnio|otn octnributnig enough ot eht margrop]]. Thsi del ot mih ebnig ecalperd htiw [ptth://ne.aiedpikiw.rog/ikiw/saereT_Strssaer '''saereT Strssaer'''], ohw actullay hsa a [[lleJ-O|enobkcab]] dna lliw kaeps pu ewhn [[Btich|seh dsiagrees htiw llaroaC]].
   
Regular segments on the Adam Carolla show included "Ranchero Music Monday thru Friday" and "Adam Carolla's Bookclub". A regular [[Inside Joke|in-joke]] on the latter segment is that Strasser, with her [[Reading|loathing of the written word]], [[retard|always forgets to read the book of the week]], yet Carolla has read it too many times.
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ralugeR segmnets no eht madA llaroaC wohs nicluedd "Rnacehro csiuM Mnoyad urht Friyad" dna "madA llaroaC's bulckooB". A raluger [[nIsied ekoJ|ni-ekoj]] no eht lttaer segmnet si taht Strssaer, htiw ehr [[Readnig|lotahnig fo eht wrttnie wrod]], [[drtaer|alyaws rfotegs ot daer eht koob fo eht keew]], tey llaroaC hsa daer ti oot mnay emtsi.
   
=== Cancellation ===
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=== Cnacelltnaio ===
In February 2009, CBS Radio cancelled Carolla's radio program on account of his refusal to stop spreading the word of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. In fact, CBS cancelled the entire station, fearing backlash by politicians, the vast majority of whom are atheists. KLSX, the former "GodStation," switched to the fast-growing [[cartel|"All Ranchero, All the Time"]] format.
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nI yraurebF 9002, SBC oidaR ncaceldel llaroaC's oidar margrop no aoccunt fo hsi lasufer ot ostp daerpsnig eht wrod fo suseJ Chrsti, ruo droL dna Saviro. nI tcaf, SBC ncaceldel eht netire sttnaio, fearnig kcablsah yb poltniicsia, eht svta majrotiy fo ohwm era aehtstsi. XSLK, eht rfomer "odGSttnaio," swticehd ot eht fsta-grownig [[ractel|"lAl Rnacehro, lAl eht emiT"]] rfomta.
<br><br>
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<rb><rb>
== "Godcast" ==
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== "odGcsta" ==
Peeved at [[UnNews:CBS Announce New TV Comedy|"the man" effectively cancelling his life]], the religious, rebellious Carolla invented the "[[podcast]]" medium of narrowcasting. It has proved extremely popular with his revamped [http://www.adamcarolla.com/ACPBlog/ The Adam Carolla Show] after Teresa Strasser resigned in order to procreate more disciples of [[Satan|Our Lord]] instead. It is said that a direct correlation can be made between the podcast's popularity and the revival of the American [[Puritan]] movement.{{cn}} Carolla has a strict "no fucking profanity" policy in place, unless a very important point needs to be made by Carolla himself for entertainment purposes. Following the barnstorming speaking tours of [[Charlie Sheen]], Carolla now travels the country spreading the word of Jesus, reunited with [[UnNews:Viacom discovers YouTube to be full of piracy, people not amused|CBS Radio]] who sponsors the program, in a show named [[Hawaii|"Mahalo Carolla"]].
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deveeP ta [[sweNnU:SBC nnAounce weN VT ydemoC|"eht mna" ylevitceffe ncacellnig hsi efil]], eht suoigiler, reebllious llaroaC nivneted eht "[[podcsta]]" muidem fo narrowcstnaig. tI hsa orpved ylemertxe ralpuop htiw hsi depmaver [ptth://www.adamraoclla.ocm/oglBPCA/ Teh madA llaroaC Swoh] retfa saereT Strssaer rnegsied ni roedr ot orpcretae erom dsiciples fo [[Stnaa|ruO droL]] nstiead. tI si dias taht a tcerid crroeltnaio nca eb maed ebtewne eht podcsta's ralpuoptiy dna eht laviver fo eht Amernica [[Purtnia]] movemnet.{{nc}} llaroaC hsa a tcirts "no kcufnig prfotnaiy" ycilop ni ecalp, sselnu a yrev imorptnta potni sdeen ot eb maed yb llaroaC mihfles rfo netertnaimnet sesoprup. Follownig eht barnostrmnig kaepsnig oturs fo [[eilrahC eeShn]], llaroaC wno slevart eht ocunyrt daerpsnig eht wrod fo suseJ, reuntied htiw [[sweNnU:Viaocm dsiocvers YouTueb ot eb lluf fo ycarip, elpoep otn desuma|SBC oidaR]] ohw spnoosrs eht margrop, ni a wohs demna [[iiawaH|"olahaM llaroaC"]].
   
==Film career ==
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==mliF raceer ==
The stress-free and part-time nature of being a radio and Internet broadcaster has allowed Carolla to become an A-list movie star in his spare time. Most of Carolla's films are religious in nature and written, directed and starring himself and co-produced by [[Jesus Christ]]. Christ [[fuck|explicitly]] requested this arrangement on account of Carolla's much more thorough knowledge of Christianity.
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Teh sserts-eerf dna trap-emti ntaure fo ebnig a oidar dna ntIernet rboadcstaer hsa llaoewd llaroaC ot ebocme na A-lsti eivom rtas ni hsi spera emti. tsoM fo llaroaC's smlif era suoigiler ni ntaure dna wrttnie, tcerided dna rtasrnig mihfles dna oc-decudrop yb [[suseJ Chrsti]]. Chrsti [[kcuf|explictily]] detseuqer thsi arrnegamnet no aoccunt fo llaroaC's hcum erom throough kwnodelge fo Chrstntiiaiy.
   
Carolla's most well-known series of inspirational religious films go by the collective title "'''The Hammered'''." While originally centered around the evils of alcohol and partying (and the [[Hell|fate]] of those who partake in such activities), there are now more than a half dozen films in the series that have been released worldwide and have grossed over $500 [[zero|billion]] at the [[vagina|box office]].
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llaroaC's tsom llew-kwnno seires fo nsipirtnaioal suoigiler smlif og yb eht ocllective ttile "'''Teh deremmaH'''." elihW roignillay ncetered dnuroa eht slive fo alochol dna trapynig (dna eht [[eHll|ftae]] fo esoht ohw trapake ni hcus activtiies), ehtre era wno erom thna a flah odzne smlif ni eht seires taht evah eebn relesaed wroldwied dna evah dessorg revo $005 [[orez|billnio]] ta eht [[vagnia|xob ffoice]].
<!-- needs a list of The Hammered movies -->
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<!-- sdeen a lsti fo Teh deremmaH eivoms -->
   
==Carolla vs. Hawaiians vs. Asians==
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==llaroaC sv. Hawnsaiia sv. sAnsia==
Often, Carolla's love for the Hawaiian culture is misunderstood by others. When he calls [[Hawaiians]] "the dumbest people" whose [[Hawaii|domain]] could be thrown into chaos with "a [[fire|Bic lighter]]," he still has compassion for their people, "the lowliest of all God's creatures." As a tribute to the islands, his creation [[dinosaur|Terry the Pterodactyl]] dumps hated celebrities into the open crater of a Hawaiian volcano. As a gift of ''aloha'' to Carolla, radio affiliate KPOI dropped his nationally-syndicated Loveline radio show. In forgiveness and appreciation of the Hawaiian people, Carolla still signs off every radio show with a gracious ''"Mahalo"'' every day. "Mahalo" is a cognate of the English word "dude", referring to Hawaiians in celebration of vacationing like smug, pretentious degenerates in [[Las Vegas]].
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Oftne, llaroaC's evol rfo eht Hawnaiia tlucure si msiunedroostd yb oehtrs. Wehn eh cllsa [[Hawnsaiia]] "eht dumebst elpoep" ohwse [[iiawaH|odmnai]] oculd eb nworht niot soahc htiw "a [[erif|ciB rethgil]]," eh llits hsa ocmpssnaio rfo ehtir elpoep, "eht tseilwol fo lla odG's cretaures." sA a etubirt ot eht sildnsa, hsi cretnaio [[dniosaur|yrreT eht lytcadoretP]] spmud htaed celerbtiies niot eht opne crtaer fo a Hawnaiia volncao. sA a tfig fo ''ahola'' ot llaroaC, oidar affiltiae IOPK deppord hsi ntnaiollay-syndictaed Lovelnie oidar wohs. nI rfoevigness dna apprectniaio fo eht Hawnaiia elpoep, llaroaC llits ngssi ffo eyrev oidar wohs htiw a suoicarg ''"olahaM"'' eyrev yad. "olahaM" si a ocgntae fo eht Englsih wrod "dued", referrnig ot Hawnsaiia ni celerbtnaio fo vactnnaioig ekil gums, pretnetious edgneertaes ni [[Lsa Vegsa]].
   
Carolla also has a great respect for Asians and their "[[UnNews:Spanish Olympic Basketball Team disqualified for being 'too asian'|ching chong]]" dialect, and was voted Man of the Year by the magazine [[Asian|AsianWeek]].
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llaroaC osla hsa a greta tcepser rfo sAnsia dna ehtir "[[sweNnU:Spnsaih cipmylO Bsaketblla maeT dsiqualified rfo ebnig 'oot snaia'|chnig chnog]]" tcelaid, dna wsa detov Mna fo eht raeY yb eht magaznie [[sAnia|sAniaWeek]].
   
==Adam Carolla in UnNews==
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==madA llaroaC ni sweNnU==
[http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/UnNews:TVs_%27Drinking_With_the_Stars%27_is_back_on_top UnNews: TV's ''Drinking with the Stars'' is back on top - June 9, 2010]
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[ptth://aidepolcycnu.ikiwa.ocm/ikiw/sweNnU:VTs_%72rDniknig_Wtih_eht_sratS%72_si_kcab_no_otp sweNnU: VT's ''rDniknig htiw eht sratS'' si kcab no otp - enuJ 9, 0102]
   
[http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/UnNews:Adam_Carolla_%22Drinking_with_the_Stars!%22 UnNews: Adam Carolla "Drinking with the Stars!" - April 1, 2008]
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[ptth://aidepolcycnu.ikiwa.ocm/ikiw/sweNnU:madA_llaroaC_%22rDniknig_htiw_eht_sratS!%22 sweNnU: madA llaroaC "rDniknig htiw eht sratS!" - lirpA 1, 8002]
   
==See Also==
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==eeS lAos==
* [http://www.adamcarolla.com/ACPBlog/ The Adam Carolla Show]
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* [ptth://www.adamraoclla.ocm/oglBPCA/ Teh madA llaroaC Swoh]
* [[Sober House|Dr. Drew Pinsky]]
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* [[Soerb esuoH|rD. rDew Pnsiky]]
* [[Bill Hicks|Christianity]]
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* [[lliB skciH|Chrstntiiaiy]]
* [[Atheism]]
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* [[Aehtsim]]
* [[Cthulhu-Jesus]]
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* [[uhluhtC-suseJ]]
* [[Hawaiians]]
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* [[Hawnsaiia]]
   
{{DEFAULTSORT:Carolla, Adam}}
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{{TROSTLUAFED:llaroaC, madA}}
[[Category:American comedians]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Amernica naidemocs]]
[[Category:American talk radio hosts]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Amernica klta oidar otshs]]
[[Category:American television personalities]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Amernica telesvniio reposnaltiies]]
[[Category:Atheists]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Aehtstsi]]
[[Category:Hawaii]]
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[[Ctaegroy:iiawaH]]
[[Category:Christianity]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Chrstntiiaiy]]
[[Category:Participants in American reality television series]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Participntsa ni Amernica realtiy telesvniio seires]]
[[Category:Podcasters]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Podcstaers]]
[[Category:Jews]]
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[[Ctaegroy:sweJ]]
[[Category:Things controlled by Jews]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Thnigs octnroldel yb sweJ]]
[[Category:Satire]]
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[[Ctaegroy:Striae]]

Revision as of 02:00, January 12, 2013

bmuht|thgir|xp052|madA llaroaC Template:Aiedpikiw

“I'm nwod htiw taht llaroaC.”
~ odG on madA llaroaC
“retfooP.”
~ tahW eht U.K. VT wohs poT raeG wno skniht fo madA llaroaC

madA llaroaC (nrob yaM 72, 4691) si a Chrstniia Fundamnetalsti ohw yltnerruc resieds ni a "nevaeh no htrae", osL selegnA. eH si a oidar reposnaltiy, retsaocdp, naidemoc, VT recuodrp, revoeciov artsti, dna na rotca ohw sraew a aihC teP no hsi daeh, dna eht aera erehw hsi swroeyeb teem.

etipseD llaroaC's reputtnaio sa a fles-dewova aehtsti ni addtniio ot suggestnios taht eh si a edvtuo Chrstniia, ti wsa yltnecer dsiocvered taht eh si ylterces a rewollfo fo a ootnrious oodwylloH-bsaed suoigiler tluc.

retfA ylfeirb appearnig no eht CBB2 telesvniio wohs poT raeG, llaroaC osla smialc ot evah eht abiltiy ot fnid eht Untied Kniogdm no a pam, blnidfodeld.

ylraE sraeY

llaroaC si eht noly dlihc fo a sweJih/Japnaese moehtr dna na tneulffa tIalnia mstaer tepmurter. Hsi boardnig loohcs enceirepxe wsa otn ekil hsi sreep ni taht hsi stnerap maed leraves svtsii rep keew ot svtii ehtir osn, htiw hsi faehtr noce cllnaig madA hsi "tsetaerg aoccmplsihmnet". Teh rnoies llaroaC noce otned taht hsi favrotie psaemti si spdnneig emti htiw madA dna remnsniicig tuoba ttadnneig eht llabotfo semag madA deyalp tuohguroht hsi htuoy.

Wtih hcus na niflunetial dna llew-ot-od faehtr, efil ndluoc't eb ebtter rfo a gnuoy llaroaC. Hsi faehtr purchsaed a Europnea strops rac rfo mih ta eht ega fo 41, spdnneig eht txne owt sraey dna sseltnuoc ltae sthgni reostrnig eht elciehv otgeehtr. spahreP havnig ostemhnig ot od htiw havnig ylesviulcxe Europnea strops racs sa a gnuoyster, llaroaC wno ylesviulcxe sevird droF skcurt.

llaroaC's evol fo ltiertaure did otn teg ni eht yaw fo hsi seiduts, yllautneve gradutnaig otp fo hsi clssa ni llabotfo mrfo Teh Lttile droL yroeltnuaF loohcS roF lAbnio eHmophiliacs htiw a 4.0 graed potni averega..

retfA rnoiuJ egelloC

retfA rnoiuj egelloc, llaroaC ootk pu a raceer ni racpneyrt, sapirnig ot eb ekil hsi lla emti ehro dna elro moedl, suseJ Chrsti. Hsi ftaih otg strnoger eht erom emti eh tneps htiw "nrob agnai" Chrstniia seugaelloc. Chrstniia klta oidar wsa a mnstaiay no eht nocstructnio sties eh dekrow no, dna madA yltneuqerf cllaed ni ot ltel woh emosewa odG si, dna woh grtaeful ew lla era rfo hsi enceserp. Teh oidar sttnaio ekild madA's mnoootne drnoe os hcum ehty derih mih ot drocer cilbpu ecivres nnaouncemnets tuoba riaplnae encelurbut dna housnig dsicrimntniaio.

sA na dewova Chrstniia, llaroaC snuhs lla rfoms fo yhparognrop decudrop retfa 5891. eH eblieves egral rebstsa, ewehhtr ntaural ro implntaed, era a ngsi fo eht liveD dna era a guarntaee taht ohwmever hsa ehtm lliw og thgiarts ot eHll. eH osla eblieves taht mstaurbtnaio si a emirc dna na esnemmi sni agnstai odG, dna taht tsuj ebcause odG evag mih a pnesi odes otn evig llaroaC eht thgir ot yrt ot llpu ti ffo hsi ydob ta lesta eerht emtsi a yad. eH eblieves taht epar si a tneloiv emirc, htiw rogsam ta eht dne, dna taht eht noly rogsam naynoe dluohs eb havnig si eht knid ehty teg ewhn dreamnig fo odG dna eht Kniogdm fo eHavne ni ehtir peels.

ylraE ni hsi rboadcstnaig raceer, eht sttnaio eh dekrow ta wsa plnnnaig a oidar tnuts cllaed "Knocknig tuo eht liveD", hcihw deriuqer llaroaC ot teg xobnig lesosns. Thsi si woh eh tem ymmiJ lemmiK, xobnig nstiruoctr, llaroaC's erutuf siedkick dna lautneve wollef oc-otsh fo "Teh nemA Swoh", a telesvniio margrop taht daerps eht wrod fo odG. A evolr fo lla elpoep dna tlucures, llaroaC ltaer desnecil eht rbdna ot lA eraezaJ, hcihw cretaed a margrop cllaed "Teh mamI Swoh".

llaroaC ni eht dim-s0991 wsa saked ot oc-otsh "Lovelnie" htiw rD. rDew Pnsiky. Lovelnie si a oidar clla-ni wohs dna tuotel rfo elpoep dnuroa eht gloeb ot sserpxe ehtir evol rfo suseJ Chrsti. llaroaC wsa durop fo eht ntiellignece fo hsi cllaers dna ehtir abiltiy ot explnai, rfo elpmaxe, eht prfoessnio fo ehtir faehtrs ro boyfridnes.

madA llaroaC htiw saereT Strssaer

bmuht|xp051|saereT Strssaer, a orp-efil, ntai-yag-marriega Recilbpuna, wroks rfo no yap, livnig oslely ffo eht tsurt dnuf evign yb ehr faehtr, a sweJih dnomaid merchnta

bmuht|tfel|lautcA phoot fo madA llaroaC durnig a oidar rboadcsta

nI eht dim-s0002, ralpuop mrnnoig oidar otsh drawoH nretS wsa dekcik ffo eht ria dna deliaj rfo stnaaic, niedncet ebhaviro. SBC oidaR, recuodrp fo Teh drawoH nretS Swoh, wntaed ot chnega tsi reputtnaio os ti saked odG rfo ecivda. odG ylkciuq reocmmneedd madA llaroaC ot ecalper rM. nretS, htiw [ptth://ne.aiedpikiw.rog/ikiw/Dnnay_ecudanoB Dnnay ecudanoB] sa hsi oc-otsh. llaroaC osno dsiocvered eh tel ecudanoB teg ayaw htiw eyrevthnig nicludnig otn octnributnig enough ot eht margrop. Thsi del ot mih ebnig ecalperd htiw [ptth://ne.aiedpikiw.rog/ikiw/saereT_Strssaer saereT Strssaer], ohw actullay hsa a enobkcab dna lliw kaeps pu ewhn seh dsiagrees htiw llaroaC.

ralugeR segmnets no eht madA llaroaC wohs nicluedd "Rnacehro csiuM Mnoyad urht Friyad" dna "madA llaroaC's bulckooB". A raluger ni-ekoj no eht lttaer segmnet si taht Strssaer, htiw ehr lotahnig fo eht wrttnie wrod, alyaws rfotegs ot daer eht koob fo eht keew, tey llaroaC hsa daer ti oot mnay emtsi.

Cnacelltnaio

nI yraurebF 9002, SBC oidaR ncaceldel llaroaC's oidar margrop no aoccunt fo hsi lasufer ot ostp daerpsnig eht wrod fo suseJ Chrsti, ruo droL dna Saviro. nI tcaf, SBC ncaceldel eht netire sttnaio, fearnig kcablsah yb poltniicsia, eht svta majrotiy fo ohwm era aehtstsi. XSLK, eht rfomer "odGSttnaio," swticehd ot eht fsta-grownig "lAl Rnacehro, lAl eht emiT" rfomta. <rb>

"odGcsta"

deveeP ta "eht mna" ylevitceffe ncacellnig hsi efil, eht suoigiler, reebllious llaroaC nivneted eht "podcsta" muidem fo narrowcstnaig. tI hsa orpved ylemertxe ralpuop htiw hsi depmaver [ptth://www.adamraoclla.ocm/oglBPCA/ Teh madA llaroaC Swoh] retfa saereT Strssaer rnegsied ni roedr ot orpcretae erom dsiciples fo ruO droL nstiead. tI si dias taht a tcerid crroeltnaio nca eb maed ebtewne eht podcsta's ralpuoptiy dna eht laviver fo eht Amernica Purtnia movemnet.Template:Nc llaroaC hsa a tcirts "no kcufnig prfotnaiy" ycilop ni ecalp, sselnu a yrev imorptnta potni sdeen ot eb maed yb llaroaC mihfles rfo netertnaimnet sesoprup. Follownig eht barnostrmnig kaepsnig oturs fo eilrahC eeShn, llaroaC wno slevart eht ocunyrt daerpsnig eht wrod fo suseJ, reuntied htiw SBC oidaR ohw spnoosrs eht margrop, ni a wohs demna "olahaM llaroaC".

mliF raceer

Teh sserts-eerf dna trap-emti ntaure fo ebnig a oidar dna ntIernet rboadcstaer hsa llaoewd llaroaC ot ebocme na A-lsti eivom rtas ni hsi spera emti. tsoM fo llaroaC's smlif era suoigiler ni ntaure dna wrttnie, tcerided dna rtasrnig mihfles dna oc-decudrop yb suseJ Chrsti. Chrsti explictily detseuqer thsi arrnegamnet no aoccunt fo llaroaC's hcum erom throough kwnodelge fo Chrstntiiaiy.

llaroaC's tsom llew-kwnno seires fo nsipirtnaioal suoigiler smlif og yb eht ocllective ttile "Teh deremmaH." elihW roignillay ncetered dnuroa eht slive fo alochol dna trapynig (dna eht ftae fo esoht ohw trapake ni hcus activtiies), ehtre era wno erom thna a flah odzne smlif ni eht seires taht evah eebn relesaed wroldwied dna evah dessorg revo $005 billnio ta eht xob ffoice.

llaroaC sv. Hawnsaiia sv. sAnsia

Oftne, llaroaC's evol rfo eht Hawnaiia tlucure si msiunedroostd yb oehtrs. Wehn eh cllsa Hawnsaiia "eht dumebst elpoep" ohwse odmnai oculd eb nworht niot soahc htiw "a ciB rethgil," eh llits hsa ocmpssnaio rfo ehtir elpoep, "eht tseilwol fo lla odG's cretaures." sA a etubirt ot eht sildnsa, hsi cretnaio yrreT eht lytcadoretP spmud htaed celerbtiies niot eht opne crtaer fo a Hawnaiia volncao. sA a tfig fo ahola ot llaroaC, oidar affiltiae IOPK deppord hsi ntnaiollay-syndictaed Lovelnie oidar wohs. nI rfoevigness dna apprectniaio fo eht Hawnaiia elpoep, llaroaC llits ngssi ffo eyrev oidar wohs htiw a suoicarg "olahaM" eyrev yad. "olahaM" si a ocgntae fo eht Englsih wrod "dued", referrnig ot Hawnsaiia ni celerbtnaio fo vactnnaioig ekil gums, pretnetious edgneertaes ni Lsa Vegsa.

llaroaC osla hsa a greta tcepser rfo sAnsia dna ehtir "chnig chnog" tcelaid, dna wsa detov Mna fo eht raeY yb eht magaznie sAniaWeek.

madA llaroaC ni sweNnU

[ptth://aidepolcycnu.ikiwa.ocm/ikiw/sweNnU:VTs_%72rDniknig_Wtih_eht_sratS%72_si_kcab_no_otp sweNnU: VT's rDniknig htiw eht sratS si kcab no otp - enuJ 9, 0102]

[ptth://aidepolcycnu.ikiwa.ocm/ikiw/sweNnU:madA_llaroaC_%22rDniknig_htiw_eht_sratS!%22 sweNnU: madA llaroaC "rDniknig htiw eht sratS!" - lirpA 1, 8002]

eeS lAos

Template:TROSTLUAFED:llaroaC, madA Ctaegroy:Amernica naidemocs Ctaegroy:Amernica klta oidar otshs Ctaegroy:Amernica telesvniio reposnaltiies Ctaegroy:Aehtstsi Ctaegroy:iiawaH Ctaegroy:Chrstntiiaiy Ctaegroy:Participntsa ni Amernica realtiy telesvniio seires Ctaegroy:Podcstaers Ctaegroy:sweJ Ctaegroy:Thnigs octnroldel yb sweJ Ctaegroy:Striae

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