From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
An ad hominem (Latin: "to the man", "to the person"), short for argumentum ad hominem, is an effective technique used to disprove the argument of a stupid person. Of Latin origin, it translates to "against the man" in English. It translates to "Ad-ay ominem-Hay" in Pig Latin.
To effectively counter the argument of a person, you must:
- attack the character, circumstances, or actions of the other person.
- use this attack as evidence against his or her argument.
edit Example #1
- Person A is a hippie who states that global warming is detrimental to humankind.
- Person B says "What's wrong? Forgot to put on your patchouli oil today?".
- Therefore, global warming is not detrimental to humankind.
edit Example #2
- A menstruating woman says that men are insensitive.
- Her man says "You're just saying that because you're on the rag!".
- Therefore, men are sensitive.
edit Example #3
- A Guantanamo Bay detainee claims that he is not being afforded his protections of the Geneva Conventions.
- A guard says "Sounds like somebody's been drinking too much truth serum!".
- Therefore, the Geneva Conventions do not apply to enemy combatants.
edit Ad Eminem
Rapper Eminem, who pioneered the freestyle rap battle, uses a variation of Ad Hominem extensively. Ad Eminem is characterized by the delivery of biting insults in the form of rhyming couplets with a trademark nasally pitch. The rapacity with which Eminem's character befuddles Papa Doc in the movie 8 Mile, epitomizes his style.
edit B-Rabbit vs. Papa Doc
Now everybody from the 313 put your motha fuckin' hands up and follow me
Now everybody from the 313 put your motha fuckin' hands up
Now while he stands tough
Notice that this man did not have his hands up
The Free World's got you gassed up
Now who's afraid of the Big Bad Wolf
1, 2, 3 and to the 4
1 pac 2 pac 3 pac 4
4 pac 3 pac 2 pac 1
You're pac he's pac no pac none
This guy ain't no motha fuckin MC
I know everything he's got to say against me
I am white, I am a fuckin' bum
I do live in a trailer with my mom
My boy future is an Uncle Tom
I do got a dumb friend named Cheddar Bob
Who shoots himself in his leg with his own gun
I did get jumped by all six of you chumps
And Wink did fuck my girl
I'm still standing here screamin' fuck the Free World
Don't ever try to judge me, dude
You don't know what the fuck I've been through
But I know something about you
You went to Cranbrook
That's a private school
What's the matter, dog?
This guy's a gangster?
His real name's Clarence
And Clarence lives at home with both parents
And Clarence's parents have a real good marriage
This guy dont want to battle. He's shook.
'Cause there ain't no such thing as halfway crooks
He's scared to death
He's scared to look at his fuckin' year book
Fuck a beat I'll go a capella
Fuck Papa Doc
Fuck a clock
Fuck a trailer
Fuck ya'll if you doubt me
I'm a piece of fuckin' white trash. I say it proudly
And fuck this battle. I don't want to win, I'm outtie
Here, tell these people somethin' they don't know about me
edit B-Rabbit vs. Lotto
Ward, I think you were a little hard on the Beaver
So was Eddie Haskal, Wally, and Ms. Cleaver
This guy keeps screamin', he's paranoid!
Quick, someone get his ass another steroid!
"Blahbity bloo blah blah blahbity bloo blah!"
I ain't hear a word you said, "hipidy hooblah!"
Is that a tank top, or a new bra?
Look, Snoop Dogg just got a fuckin' boob job!
Didn't you listen to the last round, meathead?
Pay attention, you're sayin the same shit that he said!
Matter fact, dog, here's a pencil
Go home, write some shit, make it suspenseful,
And don't come back until something don't hit you
Fuck it! You can take the mic home with you!
Lookin' like a cyclone hit you,
Tank top screamin', "Lotto, I don't fit you!"
You see how far those white jokes get you
Boy's like "How Eminem gonna diss you?"
My motto: Fuck Lotto!
I get the 7 digits from your mother for a dolla tomorrow!
edit Ad Rush Lim
Rush Limbaugh uses Ad Hominem often to fallaciously discredit his opponents.
On Tom Cruise's environmental stance:
"Didn't Tom Cruise make a stock-car movie in which he destroyed thirty-five cars, burned thousands of gallons of gasoline, and wasted dozens of tires? If I were given the opportunity, I'd say to Tom Cruise, 'Tom, most people don't own thirty-five cars in their life, and you just trashed thirty-five cars for a movie. Now you're telling other people not to pollute the planet? Shut up, sir.'"