Aardvark
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“Damn Aardvark! I'm ahead of him, and he fucking well won't acknowledge it!”
~ A
An aardvark (or Aaardvark as a useless redirect) is an animal that starts with the letter A, but adds another A to become first on a list. The most famous case of this is baseball player Hank Aaron, who is widely believed to never had gotten as famous as he did without the change.
The first commercial marketing of the aardvark by AAAAAAAnother Company Trying to Get to the Front of the Amber Pages was at best a moderate success; the company later introduced the Aaaaaaaamazing line of desktop PC monitors before finally selling the "aardvark" name to Britney Spears for inclusion in the Encyclopædia Britannica.
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[edit] What is an Aardvark
Aardvark (Afrikaans for “earth pig”), common name for a burrowing, ant-eating mammal. The aardvark is found throughout much of Africa, from the southern part of Egypt to the Cape of Good Hope, in habitats ranging from woodland, bush country, and savanna, to rain forest. A primarily nocturnal animal, the aardvark lives in burrows and feeds on ants and termites, occasionally eating other insects, the fat mouse, and a species of wild ground cucumber. Some experts claim that an aardvark can eat as many as 50,000 insects in a single night. The aardvark is up to 2.3 m (7.5 ft) long, including the fleshy, tapering tail, which it uses to throw earth backward when it burrows. An adult aardvark can weigh 39 to 64 kg (85 to 140 lb). The animal has an arched back, a tubular snout, and large, upright ears. It uses its specialized, chisel-shaped claws to break open the hard clay of termite nests; then it uses its long tongue, which is coated with sticky saliva, to capture the insects in the nest. Unlike the animals known as anteaters, which are toothless, the aardvark has 20 cylindrical, rootless teeth that grow continually throughout its lifetime. After a gestation period of seven months, the female aardvark gives birth to one or occasionally two offspring, which can dig their own burrows at the age of six months. The lifespan of an aardvark in captivity is as long as 23 years. Although timid, the aardvark will fight when it cannot flee or burrow to safety; it defends itself with its powerful claws or by striking with its tail or shoulders.
<a href="http://photobucket.com/images/aardvark" target="_blank"><img src="
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[edit] Name Etymology
Nobody really knows where the name of this animal came from. Some scholars postulate that 'aardvark' is Tibetan for "damn that's an ugly pig, yo". Others claim that is related to the Yiddish word aardvark that means "Eater of Jews'. The mystery will continue haunting academics, forever and ever. Amen.
Another speculation of where the name originated, was when a young adult male was once having a bat...and he saw an ugly hideous looking ant eater...heput his tool away and kicked the beast...and thus, the formule
[edit] I've finally found an Aardvark on my mystical plane. Can I summon a tank?
- Yes.
[edit] Retarded Table Of The Elements
Aardvark is also a highly retardioactive element on the retarded table, as seen below:
