From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
AU is the abbreviation for Astronomical Unit, a unit used by astronomicals. Currently, one AU is the mean distance between the earth and the sun. Seven AU is the distance of a trip to the sun, and back and forth six times, ending by returning to the center of the sun, which readers are encouraged not to try for themselves.
As science is never settled, except for the "settled science" of global warming, astronomicals reserve the right to redefine AU, as they frequently redefine the kilogram, so that it is something other than the mean distance between the earth and the sun. For example, an astronomical unit might become the contents of a pint dahn ta paab. This would let astronomicals measure whether they are getting their pound's worth when they go dahn ta paab to get pounded.
AU may also refer to the following: