20th Century Fox

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The new Star Wars movies just aren't the same without this opening fanfare...

20th Century Fox is an American film and television production company and mind-control unit, perhaps best known for constantly producing films so bad that Scary Movie looks like a winner by comparison.

edit Origins

In 1915, the films were still a new thing to ancient man, and so the Fox Bros., Freddy Fox and Fickle Fox, two Disneyland rejects, established a film studio under the name Fox Bros. Features, taking on ex-vaudeville actors, producers, radiators, and punters to produce shoddy, second-hand silent films with no budget. "As there was no budget, even a film that bombed would still bring in money anyway, so it's still a profit, right?" was the Brothers' most common excuse for their poorly-performing movies.

edit Enter Tex Avery

The Fox Bros., who had gone through hell whilst under the jurisdiction of Disneyland, decided to continue making films, but this time with actual plots, and plots that were based around the harshness of the Disney regime to cash in on the current hype of Disneysploitation.

At this point, filmmaker Tex Avery, world renowned for his over-the-top violence in the horror genre, came to the studio and began producing some of the most successful horror films that were so violent they would scare a blind man shitless. Despite the large profits raked in for the studio, many of the cast died while shooting the Avery films, and so the money had to be spent hiring more staff.

edit The Brothers Die

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about 20th Century Fox.

When the Fox Bros. died in 1930, Darryl F. Zanuck took a chance at running their studio through the Manic Depression, renaming it "20th Century Fox" as the Fox Bros. were no more. The studio had suffered during the Car Crash of 1929, especially when they couldn't afford to replace the actors killed in Avery's bloodfests. It was still possible to hire cheap stagehands and crewmembers, but few were willing to act in fear of their lives.

As America began to recover from the Manic Depression, more actors and actresses returned, just in time to see Tex Avery and his partners Eli Roth and Rob Zombie take on a contract with Disney. He and Zanuck never saw eye to eye, and so Fox had to continue alone, with income and pants dropping sharply.

edit Moving to TV

With movies becoming a thing of the past, Zanuck left 20th Century Fox in 1956 to work elsewhere, and the studio came under the control of Spyros Skouras, who saw potential in producing television series rather than films.

By this time, Amalgam Comics was on the scene and ready to roll. The studio, with a contract to the company, produced several, really low-budget cartoons based on Amalgam Comics characters. Most of these failed because they were just bits of comic-books cut out and stuck on wooden skewers with sticky-tape, and so the shows were soon abandoned after bombing financially and then bombing Iraq. Following the failure of these cartoons, Fox was reduced to a cardboard replica, as their original studio was repossessed by the IRS in lieu of tax payments.

edit Modern Times

Later on, 20th Century Fox was bought out by Rupert Murdoch who managed to nurse back to good health, through blockbuster movies such as the Star Wars franchise and Independence Day. They also launched their own television network in 1986, known for comedy programs such as The Simpsons, Married...with Children, Futurama, Malcolm in the Middle, and Fox News.

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