$0 bill

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  Not to be confused with all the money in your bank account
“A zero dollar bill found is a zero dollar bill earned”
~ Ben Franklin on $0 bills

The zero dollar bill is the third lowest unit of currency currently in circulation (only above the Nigerian Naira and negative $80 dollar bill). According to the most recent census, there are 45,310 0$ bills in circulation, making it the least traded item of currency.

edit History

The zero dollar bill was first minted in the year 1969, but the idea can be traced back to the year 1500 when people wanted a bill that was completely worthless so they could pay drunk prostitutes in worthless currency and still get the service. Ben Franklin was a strong advocate of the $0 bill saying "A $0 bill found is a 0$ bill earned". After many years of trying to make the 0$ bill official, the very first bills were minted in Jeffry Dahmer's basement. These original bills featured Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler, but more recent bills have featured Obama, Nixon, doge, wow guy, Benedict Cumberbatch, Kim Jong Un, our lord and savior Gaben, Shrek, [yn], and the great Weaboo.

edit The Great $0 Bill Purge

Throughout the 1970's, public approval of the zero dollar bill was the lowest of all time. This led many people (throughout the world) to burn $0 bills by the thousands. One known $0 bill burner was Shrek who, ironically appeared on 400 0$ bills minted in 2007. The great purge is why there are so few 0$ bills today.


the Hitler 0$ bill.


the Stalin 0$ bill

edit Controversy

In recent years the bills have come under fire for being "infinitely more expensive to produce than are worth" and "completely pointless", but those stupid "arguments" have bean dismissed because the $0 bill is an essential part of American culture.

edit Uses

$0 dollar bills, although completely worthless, have many uses.These uses range from a black market currency, military distraction, and fire starter. Historically, 0$ bills have bean used to trick people into thinking they were worth more. A recent study showed that 0$ bills are a 390% better fire starter than kerosene, it is therefore wise to always hike with spare $0 bills. There are constantly new studies showing just how useful 0$ bills are.

edit In the Soviet Gulags

Due to the fact that certain 0$ bills had Stalin's face on them, they were shipped to the Soviet Union in the thousands, however because they were completely worthless, 0$ bills made their way to Soviet work camps where one 0$ bill could buy you 5 old rags (food rations for one entire month). Unfortunately, when Stalin declared his face on the 0$ bill not glorious enough, every zero dollar bill in the former Soviet union was burned.

edit Military/police Applications

For crowd control and as a military distraction, thousands of zero dollar bills are thrown from horses

edit See also




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