User talk:Sycamore

GANG RAPE!

Suit you well! ~ 16:44, 21 August 2008 (UTC)

Suit you Sir:)— Sir Sycamore (talk) 16:46, 21 August 2008 (UTC)

Room for one more? -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Always sweetheart— Sir Sycamore (talk) 17:00, 21 August 2008 (UTC)

Re:Categories/quote spam (so called)

I added an ingenious category of my own invention "Things Amy Winehouse has smoked" referring to Amy Winehous's drug-problem to two articles : Sherlock Holmes, (due to the fact that he has a drug problem), Everything (implying that she has smoked, quite literally, everything) and Category:Over 9000, implying that she has smoked over 900 things. I also added two rather amusing quotes to the Over 9000 category, including one by Oscar Wilde which suggested that it would take over 9000 Goku's to screw in a lightbulb, a reference to Goku's lack of intelligence and one by the arch-villain, Freeza which suggested that Oscar Wilde would "screw" over 9000 people, a reference to Oscar Wilde's promiscuity. The joke also implied that Freeza would like to screw Oscar Wilde, a nod to Freeza's somewhat effeminate nature. --Narcissus Black 13:02, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

Ingenious! — Sir Sycamore (talk) 13:04, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

Thank you, I know. --Narcissus Black 16:01, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

Whoosh — Sir Sycamore (talk) 16:04, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

Erm, yes quite. --Narcissus Black 19:17, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

UnSignpost: August 21st, 2008

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August 21^st, 2008 • Issue Sixteen • The periodical without any junk in its trunk

And the award for Sluttiest User goes to... By Gerrycheevers ...Mhaille! With over fifteen thousand links to his userpage strewn willy-nilly about Uncyclopedia, Mhaille takes home the Slutty for the sixth consecutive time. Everyone's favorite moustachioed chappie overtook Codeine in early 2007 and never looked back. When asked about this momentous achievement, Mhaille was still in shock from the victory. "I'd like to give thanks to my mother and my father, for first taking me into the family business. Without their years of experience and their guidance I would not have become the Slut I am today," he said. "It is for them that I hope to make it a seventh title!" Coming in at second on the list was the legendary Benson. Despite having only twenty edits in the past year, Benson has managed to rack up over twelve thousand links to his userpage. He still enjoys a several thousand link lead over slut number three, Thekillerfroggy. When asked how Benson managed to not only maintain his lead, but actually increase it, TKF said, "A wizard did it." In-depth investigation by this reporter revealed that Froggy's signature may have something to do with it, as random selection feature will occasionally cause TKF's sig to spam dozens of links to Benson's userpage, mostly in Dr. Skullthumper's userspace. UnSignpost gets new paper-boy by An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays Uncyclopedia's semi-official newspaper, enjoyed by literally several readers each week, has hired a brand new paper boy. This individual has been delivering the UnSignpost for the past two weeks. This cost cutting measure was announced after the guy with the keys to the delivery robots disappeared, taking the keys, several thousand dollars in cash, and a stapler with him. Unconfirmed rumours made up by me suggest that he intends to staple the money to the keys before turning the stapler on himself. The paper boy, who calls himself Gerrycheevers, says that it is a tough job, but he is glad to be able to contribute something. "It's a tough job," he told UnSignpost reporters "but I am glad to be able to contribute something." The young paper boy is saving up his pocket money to buy a new frisbee. The mammoth task has taken its toll on young Mr. Cheevers, leaving him with severe wrist pain and an acute hatred of humanity. "It totally messed up my wrists. I was out of action for days!" he said. Most Uncyclopedians are said to be happy with the new service, saying that they prefer the more personal touch that comes with human delivery. "Those damn robots trampled my garden, broke down my door and killed my dog with their death-rays" said one unfortunate Uncyclopedian. In a related story, Gerrycheevers has been 'throttled' from such activites as moving pages and making mass edits. His repetitive edits have apparently pissed off at least one admin, and Gerry is now limited to one edit per four hours. He has used these edits carefully, and has managed to find a new paperbot. This week, the UnSignpost will be delivered by MantiBot. Subscribers can only hope the new delivery system works out, or the UnSignpost may be doomed.

Check out these pages! Testify! Taking the community down a peg Stop the madness! Think of the children! Etc.! From our logs: 16:52, 17 August 2008 Zombiebaron (Talk | contribs) blocked 203.212.136.160 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (You are now officially really hated on Uncyclopedia. Congratulations.) 21:30, 16 August 2008 Dr. Skullthumper (Talk | contribs) blocked 72.220.124.187 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month, 2 days, 3 hours, 4 minutes, 5 seconds ‎ (Blanking a featured article? No mercy.) 06:19, 16 August 2008 Spang (Talk | contribs) blocked 121.72.7.62 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (Go and write some bad poetry or something) 10:51, 20 August 2008 Manticore (Talk | contribs) blocked Nmeallin (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (We regret to inform you that Chuck Norris does not approve of page blanking.) Biopic of the Week RAHB ~ One of the most (if not the most) decorated Uncyclopedians ever, RAHB is one of those guys who seems to be everywhere. Whether it's writing awesome stuff, taking care of crap, or banging out narrations, you can always count on this guy to be lurking somewhere in the bowels of Uncyclopedia, toiling away at his next project. This Week's Horoscopes GUARANTEED TO BE ACCURATE Cancer (June 22 - July 22) - Being grateful this week could result in improved relationships. Being grating this week could result in cheese fragments that will melt easily over nachos. see more horoscopes VFD Survivor of the week "One man touches the other/it's incest cus were all brothers/you may say its wrong/well its the touch eachother song" Pithy VFH Comment of the Week Meh. I liked the conversation bit, but the rest is pretty bland. Skull tells me he wrote it for a girl or something. And he admits himself that it isn't very good. Well, I wouldn't feature it anyways. Oh yeah, and everything you write is shit, Skull. Everything! Shit, shit, shit! Now start writing something funny, you SHITTY WRITER! Shit shit shit! SHIT!!! - RAHB (Unfomercials:Inspirigun)

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MantiBot

Jaffa Cakes

Thanks for the Jaffa Cakes. They were awesome. Here's a cake that's sure to put a smile on your face. [[1]] (Not Mine)

No problem:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 15:26, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

Thanks for the greeting

Thank you for the warm greeting, Sir Sycamore and for the Jaffa Cakes (Eats one). The greeting itself felt more welcoming (Example: Make yourself at home). This site is much more impressive and interesting than Wikipedia (In fact the site itself was boring), and definitely more funnier. I'll be glad to use your helpful advice for future references.

I also hope to get to know more about the people here and everything else about the site. And who knows maybe I'll meet more friendly faces like you.

'Till later, see you next crime and thanks again for the greeting.

- Black Death

No problem, feel free to come round for help in future:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 16:10, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

SkanMan is an Admitted Noob

The SkanMan, an admitted noob has just joined the world of misinformation thusly dubbed "Uncyclopedia" and as such is thouroughly confused by the editing of user pages. In large Bold letters uncyclopedia admins warn and rewarn users against making a page about them their freinds their teachers etc... so making a user page doesnt make sense, or maybe it does...can someone tell me?—The preceding unsigned comment was added by SkanMan (talk • contribs)

It is perfectly fine to make your own userpage, if you click on my signature you can see mine (It's just a car) - however it is correct that you should not make pages outside of your userpage about yourself or friends:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 19:18, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

good looking out, appreciate it, seriously, i really like all the new user info as well, some really good tips and im sure i will be an active member of the uncyclopedia community for a long time, forgive me if i ask too many questions though because i'm sure i will have more

oh...and how did you reply so fast? it was only like two minuites later i got a response—The preceding unsigned comment was added by SkanMan (talk • contribs)

I was around and about at the time:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 21:01, 22 August 2008 (UTC)

Throwball

Thanks for your interest in the most deadly sport on earth throwball I have deleted the ICU tag after adding pictures and fixing links. thanks ThunderJaemin 02:47, 23 August 2008 (UTC) THUNDER

Thats looking pretty good, well done;) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 09:39, 23 August 2008 (UTC)

Chairman, "David Foster Wallace"

Thanks for helping (if you did!) =) Chairman 10:59, 23 August 2008 (UTC)

No problem:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 10:59, 23 August 2008 (UTC)

Oh, and also - are you interested in Wallace Stevens? {{User:Chairman/2}} 03:17, 24 August 2008 (UTC)

And also...what's wrong with the sig? Thanks for helping {{User:Chairman/2}} 03:35, 24 August 2008 (UTC)

sig

Hi there Chairman, signatures are a bit fiddly, basically create User:Chairman/sig. Now a lot of people make quite complex ones but they tend to look a little silly – the best code for a new user that easy to make is

[[User:Chairman|Chairman]] <small>(</small>[[User Talk:Chairman|<small>t</small>]]<small>)</small>

You can fiddle with it till you get something you like though (you can steal bits off other peoples to get the sort of effect you’re after). Be sure to use preview though if you alter a lot as some codes will spill over and make the page look weird.

To set it as your signature go into your preferences, and you if you look own there's a bit that says signature add this: {{SUBST:nosubst|user:chairman/sig}} in the box and click to add it as your sig, save this and anytime you click the four tildes or the sig box on the edit bar your signature should come up. — Sir Sycamore (talk) 08:50, 24 August 2008 (UTC)

Trial...hope this works. {{SUBST:nosubst|user:chairman/sig}} 15:40, 24 August 2008 (UTC)

...awkward? Chairman of the Soviet Republicks (Keep Talking) (that was inputted manually)

At the very top right theres a icon which says "my preferences". in there and add {{SUBST:nosubst|user:chairman/sig}} into the signature bit (about a quater down, click the Raw Signaure thats says that you want to use it as your signature and then click save at the bottom:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 15:44, 24 August 2008 (UTC)

Test. Chairman of the Soviet Republicks (Keep Talking) 08:38, 26 August 2008 (UTC) Yess! YESS! IT WORKZZ! NOW I GO FOR WORRLLDD DOMINATTTIION!

GOLDEN SHOWER GET!

	Rejoice, Sycamore! You have been entitled to the Golden Shower Award
	For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

Thanks :D Chairman of the Soviet Republicks (Keep Talking) 08:40, 26 August 2008 (UTC)

Oh thanks there:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 09:00, 26 August 2008 (UTC)

btw, i love Battleship Potemptkin :D Chairman of the Soviet Republicks (Keep Talking) 10:07, 27 August 2008 (UTC)

Thanks, it's one of my personal favorites of the ones i've done - Wallace is looking good as well — Sir Sycamore (talk) 10:29, 27 August 2008 (UTC)

Thx, what sections do you think I can add? And I can't think of a funny image. Chairman of the Soviet Republicks (Keep Talking) 15:40, 27 August 2008 (UTC)

You can request images here - With regards on what to add, I'm a little unsure to be honest, although I've heard of Wallace and his literary style I could'nt say I had read any of his books; My advise would be just to continue as you are with it:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 15:59, 27 August 2008 (UTC)

"I can take about an hour on the tower of power...

"as long as I gets a little golden shower!"

	Rejoice, Sycamore! You have been entitled to the Golden Shower Award
	For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

Thanks for the review. Incredibly helpful, as always. I'll be adding lots of the suggestions in the coming weeks :) -RAHB 21:54, 24 August 2008 (UTC)

OH GOD I AM THE AMERICAN DREAM... - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 22:01, Aug 24

Thanks, I've never had one of those:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 07:59, 25 August 2008 (UTC)

Well, he sure ain't a miserable sonofabitch. --Knucmo2 09:58, 26 August 2008 (UTC)

Nikola Tesla

Hi! I saw you reverted my change on Nikola Tesla, so I would like to ask you if you could please give me an explanation. I removed the sentence not because I don't personally like it or its meaning but because I actually found it meaningless (it didn't even have a dot in the end of the sentence) so I even put the comment ("wtf does this mean?") when removing it. The sentence was "He is big local-patriot called Ustaša". I mean, he was a Serb (whereas the Ustaša were Croats), he was located in USA (with USA citizenship) all the time he worked as a scientist, and Croatia didn't even exist then (it was Austro-Hungary at the time). So not only the sentence is hard to understand but also, I think, belongs to the "Uncyclopedia:How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid" section. Thank you. --Ml01172 22:15, 28 August 2008 (UTC)

I've reverted your edits back - apologies for the confusion:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 08:57, 29 August 2008 (UTC)

Reply to post on my page

Not the most original of headings but it will have to suffice. Well, you're more tolerable than than some of the pompous little twerps on this website so I'll try and be civil with you Sycamore. On Uncyclopedia, you may have noticed we have categories for everything conceivable. We have a category for Men claiming paternity of Anna Nicole Smith's Daughter, we have a category for articles that relate to Heath Ledger (rest his soul) being dead, we have a category for Unfunny Crap About Minerva, we have a category for rolling your head on the keyboard, we have a category for people murdered by Yagami Light. So why on Earth shouldn't we have a category for things Amy Winehouse has smoked? After all, as much as I love the woman she has smoked just about every drug imaginable and some that haven't even been invented yet. I consider this a perfectly good reason for a category but if it's going to upset people then I shan't bother recreating it, there's a limit to even my patience. Would you be so kind as to point out any other so called "cruft" I have produced recently. Oh and you might want to take a look at some of these very amusing articles I have created in my time on Uncyclopedia: John Gay, Da Void, The 10th Kingdom, Christine White, Septimus Pretorius and Mister Darcy. --Narcissus Black 00:22, 30 August 2008 (UTC)

Actually I don’t think your being all that civil, so to reply more fully here, and more seriously; you have not been doing good things on this site. You are forgetting the all seeing eye here. A key point to remember here is that I know what you’ve been doing around here, for the past month and beyond you’ve been “installing quotes” and nonsensical categories. These joke categories are frequently deleted and serve no good cause; they are unfunny and interfere with the purpose of these which are to organize topics into some sort of order. A similar case has been with the quotes and other such nonsense behavior (many of your own articles are in fact poorer because of this, we always advise reading this, so that user may improve their contribuitions: HTBFANJS). I asked an admin a while back over you, and he suggested putting you on Ban Patrol for this sort of gobshitery; I’m not going to do this, I’m going to hope this sinks in, and that you start doing something useful – not just a few one off good deeds but every time you come to the site. — Sir Sycamore (talk) 07:52, 30 August 2008 (UTC)

Well personally I feel very insulted. "Seriously"? Sycamore, this is uncyclopedia. "Nonsensical categories"? This website is nonsense, it's a joke, literally. Personally I think Uncyclopedia has become just as sanctimoniously pious as the website it sort to parody, lest you've forgotten. Yes I have been doing good things on this site, no I have not forgotten "the all-seeing eye" and frankly I'd like the name of the admin who you spoke about me to. --Narcissus Black 11:42, 30 August 2008 (UTC)

Correction. Uncyclopedia is not nonsense. Whoever gave you that impression is an idiot. If you developed that impression yourself, well then my good sir, you are an idiot, as you probably could have guessed. Uncyclopedia may be fun and games, but there is an order to all things. What goes on behind the scenes is more serious because we're trying to run a stable website here, and not trying to conduct some sort of infinite monkey theorem experiment. If you're really interested in nonsense, I'm sure Illogicopedia would love to have you. While you're here though, this site is supposed to, in the most part, contain coherent and original humor. Not pure nonsense. Not recycled old quotes. Not category spam. Now, I don't see what problem there is with the category in question in this particular instance, and in fact, I find it rather humorous. I'll let you work that particular detail out with Sycamore here. However, I suggest you get your facts straight on what Uncyclopedia is, and what it is not. I also suggest you learn to conduct yourself in a non-asshole fashion. I am not the admin Sycamore has spoken to you about, but if I am given reason to, I have no problem bringing the hammer down. Consider this your official warning. -RAHB 12:00, 30 August 2008 (UTC)

Well I don't know what you mean by recycled old quotes and I think we could have dispensed with the petty insults but that's reasonable enough I suppose. --Narcissus Black 12:28, 30 August 2008 (UTC)

UnSignpost: August 28th, 2008

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The Newspaper That Wonders What Happened To You. You Used To Be Cool.

August 28^th, 2008 • SEVENTEENTH ISSUE SPECTACULAR • Word to your mother

Porn Wars End in Sticky Truce By Regret Tenenbaum At exactly 10:28 pm (UTC), Sir Led Balloon did the honors of emblazoning a golden '1000' in the count to a million project, a true milestone on the journey to seven-digit greatness. Another user celebrated by gracing the page with an unprecedented one-thousand-and-one pixel high "1001", which was quickly taken down. The user was, needless to say, embarrassed, yet happy that the uncouth horde of devoted Uncyclopedians had finally reached the number 1000, as such a milestone had not been reached since the number 100 and the end of the Porn Wars. On that note, the Porn Wars ended earlier this week with a tentative truce between Commander Jailbait and General Pervert. The war began the week before, when Regret posted a pin-up girl to balance Orian's photo of a scantily-clad male, claiming he was "bringing balance back to the universe." Regret also stated he would "fight to the death"... or at least until Leddy stepped in, this time to call a "three-pornstuffs rule", which eventually ended the erotic feud. Meth, a constant editor on the forum, said "'twas a fortunate day for all under 18." Still, even with peace returning to the forum, not all is well in the land of counting. On the subject of reaching 1000, one dissenting user said: "Perhaps we should seriously consider stopping there. I mean that would be 1/1000 of the goal! Imagine doing this whole thing, 1000 times. That would mean 3000 archives, give or take." To which another user responded, "unfortunately for you, Nobody cares." Nevertheless, as long as there are users with nothing better to do, the Forum will always trudge on, giving Uncyclopedians something with which to kill thirty seconds, and also giving UnSignpost reporters something to write about. Lack of cure for testicular cancer kills 100 Uncyc members By Methamphetamine Uncycloversity members are still failing to find a cure for our previously mentioned testicular cancer, and to date, 100 people have died of said cancer. When nobody died, some user said it was a rumor made by some other user to piss us all off, right before clutching his balls in pain and dropping dead. Within an hour, about 16 more people died a cancer-related death. A live update shows that 105 users are now dead. You could be next! Don't panic, that'll make you die faster. Regret Tenenbaum, the user who originally warned of the disease, had this to say: "I TOLD YOU SO!" to which he added "Na-nanana-nanana!" The death toll is expected to reach into the thousands, with no end in sight. A memorial was set up earlier today to remember the dead, with one number added for every fallen Uncyclopedian. With fear and panic filling the hearts of users everywhere, there is one question that is on everyone's mind: "WHY GOD, WHY?!" Another live update show that 200 people have now died, and out of those, 10 people killed themselves in anxiety. Remember to always feel your testicles with your fingers. That's right. It helps prevent the cancer from reproducing.

Check out these pages! VOTE VOTE VOT Everyone tell Cajek what they've been up to Who is the man behind Uncyc's curtain? The truth about wikia's staff! From our logs: 05:22, 20 August 2008 Dr. Skullthumper (Talk | contribs) blocked 12.219.249.248 (Talk) with an expiry time of 3 days, 14 hours, 15 minutes, 93 seconds ‎ (Blanking Africa does not make it go away.) 20:45, 24 August 2008 Olipro (Talk | contribs) blocked Norwich (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite ‎ (and you're an annoying cuntfluff) 09:39, 26 August 2008 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked 93.190.63.2 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (o hai, no blank plz. kthxbai.) 00:41, 27 August 2008 Mhaille (Talk | contribs) huffed My balls (content was: 'Sweaty and hot.') Biopic of the Week TheLedBalloon - Feature machine and Star Wars aficionado, Uncyc's resident hockey expert has come a long way from his humble beginnings. Seeming to appear on talk pages where there is conflict brewing as if there was some giant balloon signal silhoutted against the clouds, Led's recent oppage ensures that he has the tools to keep Uncyc as most excellent as possible. Old-school featured article of the week Five-time World RiskTM Champion Napoleon Bonaparte was a man of great stature. He enjoyed many military victories, revolutionizing armed combat. He rose to the rank of Emperor, and came closer than any diabolical supervillian has (before or since) to conquering the world. Unfortunately, nobody took him seriously because he was short. This Week's Horoscopes NOW UPDATED FOR WEEK OF 8/25/08 Aquarius (Jan. 20 - Feb. 18) - Think long and hard before misdirection-linking to the Uncyclopedia article on Penis, as it could result in stiff competition between you and other members of your unit. see more horoscopes

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–—Hv (talk) 30/08 20:13

Thanks:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 07:54, 31 August 2008 (UTC)

"You"

Okay, now there is another Miley Cyrus problems. The "You" article has a bunch of Miley Cyrus crap in it. Not only is it insulting but it's irrelivent. You need to do something about that article. 72.95.139.248 22:58, 30 August 2008 (UTC)

I've had a look, not only have a grown weary of the Hannah Montana affair, I'm already bored by this - to repeat what I said before - "this is a satirical website, not a fan site". I hope this behavior stops; I'm not Miley Cyrus, or Hannah Montannas agent - should there be a poor aspect to an article, you are more than welcome to try and rectify it. I ask politiley that you turn your attentions to more productive matters, and stop this nonsense. Thank You — Sir Sycamore (talk) 07:49, 31 August 2008 (UTC)

This isn't just defending Miley, but all the crap in the You article is irrelivant. This is a violation of your rules. I don't give a shit if you're annoyed with me. Fix it. 72.95.139.248 17:04, 31 August 2008 (UTC)

Yea! Fix it! I could also not help but notice that this article needs more funny things adding to it. Please do so imminently. Also, I need a new cover for my ironing board, and if you could make me more popular with the ladies that would be very welcome. MrN  Fork you! 17:13, Aug 31

Ta

For the HTCPCP review, really appreciated!

Hv|User:Heerenveen|Hv has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Thanks again! –—Hv (talk) 31/08 17:08

No problem, I hope to see it out on VFH again soon:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 17:12, 31 August 2008 (UTC)