UnNews:Captain America falls victim to Daylight Savings Time
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12 March 2007
Neighbours were shocked to discover that Rogers, age 66, was the secret identity of the beloved super hero. "I always thought he seemed very fit for someone his age, but Captain America? No way! To think I've been living across the hall from him all of these years, and I had no idea!"
Forensic experts believe that confusion over the early-onset of Daylight Savings Time may have resulted in an accidental overdose of Super-Soldier Serum, causing a fatal shock to his system. "This Super-Soldier Serum is some pretty powerful stuff anyway, but there was simply no way that he could survive a double dose at his age."