Mew

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search
(Mews secert)
(I assume you are the same person as the last IP? Reverting again because of 1) poor grammar and 2) the fact that other articles mention "quantum paradox." Will discuss)
Line 61: Line 61:
 
''(author of this few lines gets kidnapped by [[fat people|an unknown malevolent phantom]])''
 
''(author of this few lines gets kidnapped by [[fat people|an unknown malevolent phantom]])''
   
===Mews secert===
+
===Mews and Quantum Paradoxes===
In the beginning,mew was along so he created Heaven pokemon name Arceus and Arceus created something for and thus Cresseila was born and Giratina born and other too. long before any Humans or Pokemon inhabited the
+
{{inaccurate}}
Earth, there was nothing.mew trun into Swirls of cosmic dust were the only thing
+
[[image:MewPKMN.png‎]]
that filled the emptiness. Finally, just because it had the will to
+
[[image:Mew.PNG|thumb|Yeah, that is a Mew. Wait, what the hell?]]
exist, the very first Pokemon appeared. That Pokemon was Mew.
 
For a century Mew was amazed with life. It spent its time looking
 
for another like itself. But there was nothing. Mew was all alone.
 
This made Mew lonely, and he was angry. As the anger welled up inside
 
him, the cosmic dust began to swirl. This swirling dust created Earth
 
right before Mew's eyes, and this interested it. Mew Flew down to
 
Earth, and explored it. Once again, Mew was searching for others like
 
it.
 
Once again, Mew found nothing. his search was in vain. Earth was a
 
boring place, a mere ball of rock. This time, however, Mew was not
 
angry because his evilside left him. Mew became sad. As he Flew away from Earth, his tears trailed
 
behind, landing in the many craters that existed on Earth. Thus, Mew
 
created time and space pokemon name Dialga, Palkia than eath than Water.
 
Looking back at Earth, Mew realized what he had done. The Water was
 
so beautiful, and it felt that something other than itself should be
 
able to enjoy it. The Earth gave it inspiration, and Mew imagined a
 
great Pokemon that would rule the Ground, and another great Pokemon to
 
rule the Water. To its surprise, the Pokemon appeared. Groudon, the
 
God of Ground, and Kyogre, the God of Water, appeared. Mew was happy.
 
Not wanting to disturb the newly created Pokemon, Mew made itself
 
invisible and decided to watch the two. Groudon wished to create more
 
Land, but had trouble seeing where it was walking. Thus, Groudon
 
created the Sun.
 
Kyogre was happily bathing in the Water that Mew created when, all of
 
a sudden, there was no more. Kyogre looked to the sky, and saw a
 
bright shining object. Believing it to be the cause of its misery,
 
Kyogre summoned the first Rain. The Earth quickly filled with more
 
Water, and Kyogre was happy.
 
Kyogre's Rain lessened the Sun's rays, and this angered Groudon. Its
 
anger aroused, the mighty God of Ground traveled for days to reach
 
Kyogre. When Groudon finally reached Kyogre, it lifted its enormous
 
foot and slammed it down deep into the Earth, creating an Earthquake.
 
Kyogre fell into the valley that formed from Groudon's attack, and
 
could no longer be seen. Finally satisfied, Groudon reveled in the
 
Sun's warmth, and the Water evaporated. Groudon walked around Earth
 
for many days, raising the mighty Mountains with its claws and carving
 
the vast Valleys with its tail.
 
Having been hurt badly by the Earthquake, Kyogre needed Rest. After
 
a while, Kyogre was fully restored, and angrier than ever. Kyogre
 
rose out of the valley and once again summoned its Rain. It began
 
roaming the Earth in search of Groudon. As Water returned to the
 
Earth, Kyogre grew more and more powerful. When it finally came
 
across Groudon, Kyogre took a deep breath and sucked up as much of the
 
Water as it could. Kyogre then spit all the water out forcefully, and
 
doused Groudon with it. Severely hurt, but not down for the count,
 
Groudon arose and once again raised its mighty foot.
 
Mew, horrified at what was taking place on Earth, felt it had to do
 
something. Mew imagined a Pokemon that was powerful enough to take on
 
both Groudon and Kyogre, and thus Rayquaza was born.
 
Rayquaza was born with a Purpose, and this Purpose it knew well.
 
Outraged, Rayquaza flew towards the battling Pokemon. When it
 
arrived, it let out a great Roar. The Gods of Ground and Water were
 
blown far, far away.
 
Groudon, befitting for the God of Ground, was blown into one of the
 
Valleys it created, and, nearing death, Rested. The God of Ground
 
would now lie dormant.
 
Kyogre was blown into the Ocean, and sunk to the very bottom. Also
 
nearing death, Kyogre needed Rest. The God of Water would also lie
 
dormant.
 
Rayquaza, its Purpose fulfilled, needed a place to Rest to as well.
 
Rayquaza tried sleeping on the Ground, but it was not comfortable.
 
Rayquaza then Flew to the Ocean, and tried to sleep there, but was
 
also uncomfortable. Rayquaza realized it would have to create a place
 
to Rest. Flying high above Earth, where it could keep watch on both
 
Groudon and Kyogre, Rayquaza created the Air and began its long Rest.
 
Happy with Rayquaza, Mew flew to Earth again to inspect it. Unlike
 
Rayquaza, Mew liked both Groudon and Kyogre's work. The Sun was
 
beautiful and warm, and the Rain was cool and soothing. Mew wanted
 
other Pokemon to enjoy this, and it began to Fly around Earth for
 
inspiration.
 
Mew reached one of Groudon's Mountains, and was inspired. Mew saw a
 
strange assembly of boulders on the Mountain, and it imagined a
 
Pokemon. Regirock was born.
 
Mew reached one of Groudon's Valleys, and was inspired. Along the
 
Valley wall, a shiny grey material reflected Mew's face. Mew imagined
 
a Pokemon, and Registeel was born.
 
Mew then reached an area on Earth it had never seen before. The Sun
 
was not as warm in this region, and the Water was solid. Mew was
 
fascinated by this, and named the solid water Ice. Inspired by its
 
own work, Mew created Regice.
 
Feeling it had done enough for the day, Mew Flew away from the Earth
 
and decided to Rest like the others.
 
Rayquaza awoke before any other Pokemon. It began to Fly around in
 
the Air, and grew bored. From the atmosphere, Rayquaza could see that
 
Mew had created three new Pokemon. Wanting to outdo its creator, and
 
to have companionship, Rayquaza decided to create others like itself.
 
Three distinct areas existed in the Air where Rayquaza roamed, and it
 
decided to create a Pokemon for each region.
 
Rayquaza Flew to the Air above the Ice. This area was cold, and from
 
the Ice crystals in the air, Rayquaza created the God of Ice,
 
Articuno.
 
Rayquaza Flew next to the Air above where Kyogre was Resting. Here,
 
curious yellow beams shot forth from the Air, and from these, Rayquaza
 
created the God of Thunder, Zapdos, who was more powerful than
 
Articuno.
 
Rayquaza then Flew to the Air above where Groudon was Resting. Here,
 
the Sun shone brightly, and it was hot. Rayquaza was disappointed
 
with its first two works, Articuno and Zapdos, as they were not as
 
strong as it was. Rayquaza wanted to create something greater, and
 
thus Moltres, the God of Fire, was born from one of the Sun's rays.
 
Unbeknownst to Rayquaza, two more Pokemon like itself were created.
 
Both Groudon and Kyogre dreamed while they Rested, and each dreamed of
 
a Pokemon that was both like Rayquaza and themselves. Ho-oh burst
 
forth from the Sun as a result of Groudon's dream. Deep beneath the
 
Ocean, Lugia was born as a result of Kyogre's dream.
 
The three legendary Bird Pokemon, Articuno, Zapdos, and Moltres,
 
decided to create as well. Not being as powerful as Rayquaza, they
 
each knew they could only create one Pokemon. Since they already
 
roamed the Air, they decided to create a Pokemon in their image to
 
roam the Earth. Articuno, the weakest of the three, tried in vain to
 
create an Ice Pokemon. From this failed attempt, Suicune, the
 
legendary Water Pokemon was born. Zapdos created Raikou, the
 
legendary Electric Pokemon, and Moltres created Entei, the legendary
 
Fire Pokemon.
 
Lugia, too, felt the urge to create. Being stronger than Rayquaza's
 
creations, it could create two Pokemon. Lugia wanted to create others
 
like itself, and imagined Latios and Latias.
 
Many centuries after the creation of Earth, another Pokemon like Mew
 
appeared. Out of sheer will to exist, a single seed was planted on
 
Earth. From this seed, Celebi was born. Wherever Celebi went, great
 
Forests sprang forth. Realizing this, Celebi felt the need to Protect
 
its creations. Thus, Celebi became the Voice of the Forest itself,
 
and remained hidden until its powers were needed.
 
Pokemon of all shapes, sizes, and types were born from the elements
 
that existed. There were those that inhabited the Grass that Celebi
 
created, those that resided in Kyogre's Water, and a few even took to
 
the Air that Rayquaza had created. Many more sprang forth over time,
 
and though they were all vastly different, they shared one thing in
 
common. They all enjoyed Groudon's Sun, and were frightened each
 
night when it left them. Wherever Groudon's Sun did not touch, there
 
was total Darkness. Although some Pokemon were born and thrived in
 
this Darkness, most were afraid. This is why Mew created Jirachi, who
 
filled the night sky with stars. Each star was a tiny night light for
 
the Pokemon. The Pokemon no longer feared the Darkness.
 
Long after Pokemon were created, Humans were created. Mew decided to
 
do this because the Pokemon needed friends unlike themselves. Mew's
 
Ancientpowers had dwindled over Time, and, unfortunately, all Humans
 
looked about the same. In time, however, differences arose, and this
 
divided the Humans. In turn, they divided the Earth. Each division
 
was given a name: Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, and Orre. The different Humans
 
settled in each of these regions, and all was peaceful for a time.
 
After Humans created Technology, they began to grow curious about
 
their origin. Using Science, they unearthed the oldest fossil
 
recorded on Earth. This fossil was a part of Mew, whom they knew
 
created them. History has shown that each creation, in turn, desires
 
to create, too. Humans were no different. Using Mew's fossil, Humans
 
created Mewtwo. Mewtwo was named because it was supposed to be
 
stronger than Mew. To their dismay, they succeeded. Furious at being
 
a mere experiment, Mewtwo destroyed the lab from which he was created,
 
and exiled himself. No Human would ever control Mewtwo.
 
Mewtwo grew lonely, however, and wished for others like himself.
 
Using Science, Mewtwo created clones of existing Pokemon, and dwelled
 
in peace with them. Far away, however, Science was being used for a
 
different purpose.
 
Wanting to explore the vast Space that existed outside of Earth,
 
Humans created vessels that would carry them to the stars and beyond.
 
The very first rocket launched into Space was a failure, however, and
 
exploded upon leaving the atmosphere. This was an evil omen of things
 
to come. From the deaths of the Pokemon on board that rocket, another
 
legendary Pokemon was created. This Pokemon was sinister, and it
 
differed from any other Pokemon. It had no form, yet it had many
 
forms. It existed outside of both Space and Time, and because of
 
that, it decided to rule them. This DNA Pokemon's name is Deoxys.
 
And when deoxys come to earth? Dialga, Palkia had created Heatran. how Heatran was born from the flames of a volcano when Dialga, Palkia and their relatives first created the universe. The lava and magma pooled together to become the first living Heatran, and later Heatran battle again Deoxys but Mewtwo defeat Heatran and hurt Deoxys but all that negative emeny wave shot toward Science lad than the lad exploded and mew fly bylad and got hit negative emeny that hurt mew a litte but mew didnt know he had evilside name missingno that how missingno reborn and Science got Lugia DNA and dake pokemon DNA too.Science fusion DNA together a New Legendary born Name Shadow Lugia AND Other was born too.
 
   
and is father of ash
+
Mew society is a quantum paradox. {{cn}}
  +
  +
The endless mysteries surrounding the way Mews breed are both endless and mysterious. One has suggested they breed through [[parthenogenesis]]<!-- please don't remove this redlink yet; I will file a request at UN:REQ -->, but that's too big a word for it to be real, everyone knows that all real things are less than 6 letters long. Experts believe{{cn}} that only one Mew presently exists, but no one knows where it is except for the self-proclaimed "Players" who all claim to have a Mew. This creates more Quantum Paradoxes.
  +
  +
Mew has the basic DNA of all Pokemon, because they all evolved from him/her/it and thus can do anything any Pokemon can do, even those who came before it. However, this creates more quantum paradoxes. Thus, Mew will, ultimately, cause the end of Civilization as we know it, possible paving the way for sentient rocks, as has been predicted for years.
  +
  +
Another interesting issue is regarding his/her/its gender. Since we descended from it, is it our ''great-great-...-great-grandfather'' or ''great-great-...-great-grandmother''? Or is it an alien? A [[quantum]] [[paradox]]? [[Your Mother]]? [[fat people|An unknown malevolent phantom]]? A "Player" in disguise? Cthulhu? A [[quantum]] [[paradox]]? No wait, I'm repeating myself.
  +
  +
{{Greek gods templates}}
  +
[[Category:Pokemon]]

Revision as of 17:54, July 19, 2009

Mew 200px-Mew
Japanese name Myuu
Stage Basic
Evolves from Primordial Ooze
Evolves to Modern Pokemon
Generation First
Species Quantum Paradox Pokemon
Type Psychic
Height No-one cares.
Weight No-one cares+1
Ability Synchronize
Next Pokemon Torchic
Previous Pokemon Mewtwo


Nuvola apps important yellow This article may contain one or more inaccuracies or does not cite all of its sources.[citation needed]
The author(s) must promptly be executed.[Wikipedia Sez This Is False] Uncyclopedia contains no inaccuracies.[Wikipedia Sez This Is False]
This template may also be inaccurate.[Wikipedia Sez This Is False]

Mew was the first species of Pokemon to crawl out of the primordial ooze, and also the longest living. It came to life the same way we did, and technically, we evolved from it[citation needed]. So did the primordial ooze. Which is a quantum paradox.

It was born after the universe was created by Arceus, leaving one big mystery: Mew is a Pokemon, from which all others are descended, but Arceus, Dialga, Palkia, Azelf, Uxie and Mesprit all came before it chronologically. This is a quantum paradox.


As such, this leaves many questions about Mew unanswered, although a fat cancerous creationist stated, "God did it. You're going to hell." However, no intelligent people could be reached for any comments on this perplexing mystery.

It is a well-known fact that Mew is God wearing a cat suit. Why someone like that would want to wear a cat suit is a quantum paradox. See above. Since you are made in his image, go ahead and put on a cat suit. Oh, now you've done it. You will now get cancer in every part of your body. Even in body parts you don't have.

This has made Mew a quantum paradox, and we all know what happens to quantum paradoxes, don't we?

Wait! How come if we are all descended from mew, and mew can be caught by master balls, than we- mmmf ARRGH HELP..... (author of this few lines gets kidnapped by an unknown malevolent phantom)

Mews and Quantum Paradoxes

Nuvola apps important yellow This article may contain one or more inaccuracies or does not cite all of its sources.[citation needed]
The author(s) must promptly be executed.[Wikipedia Sez This Is False] Uncyclopedia contains no inaccuracies.[Wikipedia Sez This Is False]
This template may also be inaccurate.[Wikipedia Sez This Is False]

MewPKMN

Mew

Yeah, that is a Mew. Wait, what the hell?

Mew society is a quantum paradox. [citation needed]

The endless mysteries surrounding the way Mews breed are both endless and mysterious. One has suggested they breed through parthenogenesis, but that's too big a word for it to be real, everyone knows that all real things are less than 6 letters long. Experts believe[citation needed] that only one Mew presently exists, but no one knows where it is except for the self-proclaimed "Players" who all claim to have a Mew. This creates more Quantum Paradoxes.

Mew has the basic DNA of all Pokemon, because they all evolved from him/her/it and thus can do anything any Pokemon can do, even those who came before it. However, this creates more quantum paradoxes. Thus, Mew will, ultimately, cause the end of Civilization as we know it, possible paving the way for sentient rocks, as has been predicted for years.

Another interesting issue is regarding his/her/its gender. Since we descended from it, is it our great-great-...-great-grandfather or great-great-...-great-grandmother? Or is it an alien? A quantum paradox? Your Mother? An unknown malevolent phantom? A "Player" in disguise? Cthulhu? A quantum paradox? No wait, I'm repeating myself.

Template:Greek gods templates

Personal tools
projects