Main Page

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search

The database did not find the text of a page that it should have found, named "(fixme, bug)" .

This is usually caused by following an outdated diff or history link to a page that has been deleted.

If this is not the case, you may have found a bug in the software. Please report this to Wikia staff, making note of the URL.


Revision as of 06:13, May 3, 2005

Rainbow

Sauron is Lord of the Dance. Keep Sauron?


Welcome to Uncyclopedia

The free encyclopedia of politically incorrect non-information.


Sophia has inspired us to work on 31,121 articles since opening in January 2005.

Before editing, please read the writing guidelines and flamewar manual.

Browse:

Politics | Games | Computers | People | Quaint | Coherent
Most Popular | Alphabetical Index | Other Categories...

Browse Uncyclopedia

Featured Article

Today's Featured Article - Colloquialism

Apprenticeship

Colloquialisms are, you know, a bunch of mumbo-jumbo words your everyday Johnny-come-lately uses when chewing the rag, and not cool for, like, formal speech or whatever. The crincum-crancum of the common tongue is mainly used during pow-wows or bull sessions when hanging out. The word colloquial originally was about the way we talk, where the prose marches to a different drummer than writing things down and all that sort of stuff. Throwing a curved ball however, the colloquial register is about free and easy language rather than, you know, the medium. The Dictionary shows colloquialisms with the abbreviation colloq. for geeks and bookworms.

By and large, colloquial language is standalone from run-of-the-mill formal speech or writing. The mixed bag of jibba-jabba tends to bubble to the surface, once the speaker has chilled out enough to pull his/her head out of her/his ass. Babblative chit-chat may contain a bucket load of slanguage, but for all intents and purposes, is not tied to hackneyed terms at all. Other examples of colloquial language use word mash and foul language, more often than not. A colloquial name is also the nickname punters use to peg a thing or person in the place of the real name. An inflated tractor tyre pulled behind a speedboat at a holiday resort and indeed the geezer driving it, could be refered to as a doughnut, or as Doughnut by both the tourists and the locals.

Colloquialisms are a bigger ball of wax than just pidgin speak used by kids, grunts, fish-heads or donkey-wallopers. In the main, colloquial language shakes and bakes words and terms that are commonly known and easily understood by speakers of the language worldwide: "See all, ear all, say nowt. Eat all, sup all, pay nowt. An' if th'ivver does owt for nowt, allus do it for thissen." for example. Slang is a posse of phat raps home-boys use to flex they's sickness, to be down with the rat packs. Slang can sound like a load of epizootics of the blowhole to your average Mondeo-Man, as — despite slang terms being a dime a dozen — they not part of standard English, dig? (more...)

Recently featured: Hillary Clinton

Yesterday's Featured Article -

You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured.

More of the best of Uncyclopedia

Selected anniversaries

Lost

August 2: Intentionally Give A Stranger Misleading Directions Day

  • 456 - Maurading Mongol hoardes are repeatedly given misleading directions, resulting in wide swaths of carnage being cut through unsuspecting and largely unpopulated regions of central Europe.
  • 1877 - When asked for directions by a stranger, Oscar Wilde, then at the height of his wit, searingly suggested that the stranger seek directions from his own mother.
  • 1922 - Allen Zeitgeist asks for directions to New York from Boston. Told to "turn left where the large tree used to be" the series of events that followed causes the stock mareket crash and the great depression.
  • 1939 - Tomasz Wankovszki, a Ukrainian farmer, accidentally starts World War II by sending the German army into Poland, telling them that it is actually a shortcut to Czechoslovakia.
  • 1939 - (12:22pm) Hitler refuses to order troops to stop at gas station and ask for directions; Warsaw and Krakow invaded by accident.
  • 1993 - The shocking discrepancy between male and female drivers who ask for directions is highlighted in a study by Cambridge professor Dr. Gerry von Coppenfeels.

Archived Anniversaries

In the news

Ants1.jpg

Recent Second Front Pages: GreeceHillary!UK election


More Current Events

Did you know...


Read More

For nonsense related chat, see #uncyclopedia @ IRCnet. (If you don't have an IRC client, you can use this link. Just change the nickname to your uncyclopedia name and the channel to #uncyclopedia.)

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.

Personal tools
projects