LazyTown

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About

LazyTown was originally believed to be a children's educational show to make kids learn on exercise and eating healthy foods. However, it is really a sick and twisted show that promotes pedaphilia, kidnapping, satanism, and Icelandic national propaganda!

Characters

Child Stephanie

File:Stephsleep.jpg
File:CALLTHECOPS.jpg

Twin of Dead-rie Barlow from Coronation Street, Stephanie opened her first brothel as soon as she came to LazyTown forcing Trixie to live up to her name.She made her fortune off of sex blackmail and built an empire in kiddie porn using her clients and bitches as her stars.An ultra violent temper keeps her whores in line as she once made them watch as she cooked and devoured one of her sluts who shorted her a dollar. Stephanie expanded her vast wealth when she sold her soul to Satan in exchange for success with her string of # 1 XXX Rated Kiddie CD'S becoming a sex Demon in the process. As shown here, Stephanie even had sex with animals to get what she wanted.

Adult Stephanie

The insidious horrors of Stephanie's child form are infinitesimally dwarfed by the powers of her fully developed adult form.
Adultsteph

The fully-developed and omnipotent adult form of Stephanie.

Adult Stephanie can assail with her cranium. Known for doing strip shows for her undead minions, Adult Stephanie is, indeed, Satan's most fiendish demon to date. She has molested everyone in town, runs an underground drug empire, and has even seduced many people from out of town, including Al Gore (after the creation of his documentary), Waspinator, and even You.

Sportycus

DaliStache

Sportycus before his late Surreal. Isn't it awsome

Sportycus is the superhero of LazyTown, but is Stephanies bitch (duh). His "sports candy" is actually steroids. He rapes the citizens of LazyTown everyday in his SHB (Super Hobo Blimp). He lives in a trashy blimp where he stores his hoard of Viagra. When he detects a fat little girl on his monitor, he sky dives down and rapes her. He once crashed into a plane full of nuns, I would like to say that they raped him but of course we all know they had a peaceful game of scrabble. He is currently hiding from the United Nations in Florence, Italy.
Hindenburg

Sluttygus on a bad day.

File:Ewwwww.JPG

Robbie F#cken

He is always trying to make LazyTown not lazy and a town with lots of raping going on (but it already is). He constantly shoots down Sl*tygus' blimp, trying to kill him while S*ttygus is dealing with a client (because hes a hooker). Robbie always makes up retarded plans, and always ends up f*cking himself at night because of it. He always fools S*ttygus with his IQ of -5, far higher than anyone in LazyTown. During the invasion of LazyTown, he was killed when an FBI officer shot his neck, thus killing him by severing a critical artery. It was later revealed Robbie survived the attempt on his life, and he now lives in a trailer in the middle of a swamp in Louisiana.

Ziggy

A fat-assed kid who like sticking larger-than-life lollipops up his rear, Ziggy was the first to meet Stephanie when she arrived in Lazy Town and was immediately drawn into an ass raping. He is now still a fat, but obsessive child who continuously follows Stephanie or Sportacus for some loving. He goes insane, dawning a cape and mask and calling himself Sportacandy. He is often visited by Stephanie and her slimy partner Stingy for some bum raping. During the attack on the town, Ziggy was captured and placed in a mental institute where he is forced to eat cat poop and vegetables every two hours.

Stingy

A slimy and greedy guy who becomes Stephanie's partner is crime. Pompous, selfish and obsessed with money, Stingy's way of life is based on "everything I see is mine". His most prized possessions are his car (a '76 Ford Thunderbird) which he often tries to seduce Stephanie in, and his piggybank. Stingy often accompanies Stephanie on her sex attacks on the residents of Lazy Town. Later, he was rejected by Stephanie, prompting Stingy to go on a riot around the town, shooting down Sportacus' blimp which crashed into the town hall. Stingy became a fugitive escaping across Europe, running into Sportacus in Germany. The two ran to Finland and hid out until Stingy drugged Sportacus and stole his new motorcycle. He rid all the way to New York where Pixel now dwelt and stayed with him. A SWAT Team brake in after Stingy steals the Declaration of Independence. He tries to flee through a window, but the shutter slices his body in two, his torso falling into a dumpster. His legs are now isolated in a warehouse in the middle of the Sahara Desert. As for Stingy, he is now on the run across America, using his arms to move about.

Trixie

A bitchy child criminal who steals, murders and graffitis everything in sight. She the second victim of Stephanie, living up to her name. Trixie now has a personal vendetta against Stephanie and the town itself. Her country of origin is unknown, but is suspected she is from the pits of Hell. Trixie went on the run from the SWAT teams that invaded Lazy Town but was hunted down in Texas and assassinated, a bullet to the head.

Pixel

A black, ginger, computer nerd who has a problem with hacking into top secret government projects. He has hacked into the White House, the Pentagon, NASA and he even has the mobile phone number of Britney Spears. He has managed to never been molested by Stephanie by locking himself in his house. However, as a result, he has lost sleep and now plays Tetris all day long. Pixel was hired by the American government to help hunt down the missing members of Lazy Town. Pixel ended up moving to New York where he met Stingy. He allowed him to stay with him, until Stingy stole the Declaration of Independence. A SWAT team broke in and shot Pixel dead, Stingy escaping through a window.

The Mayor

The idiotic mayor of Lazy Town and Stephanie's uncle, Mayor Milford Meanswell is a nice guy always ends up in the wrong situations. He has a tendency to get involved in things he is unaware of in his town. Notable events include allowing a gang of hit men to use the town hall as a hideout, a drug dealer giving Ziggy a truck full of magic mushrooms, allowing the cast of Sesame Street to visit, and he briefly joined the FBI as a secret agent. He was fired from his job as mayor during the SWAT Team attack on the town by Elmo. He protected Stephanie from harm and allowed her to escape, at the cost of his own death. His body was buried under the steps of town hall.

Mrs. Busybody

Bessie Busybody is a tyrannical tycoon owner who seems to run the town for the Mayor. She is known not for her pompous attitude, but her love of attempting to seduce all the male civilians of the town into doing her bidding, and often wins over the Mayor. She survived the attack on Lazy Town and was the only resident to actually remain, everyone else was on the run, arrested, dead or in bedlam. Bessie now hides in her house with Waspinator, armed with a shotgun and hurling cats at anyone who dares come near her house. In 2006 a range of vibrators was named after her, and she is currently locked in a legal battle over the rights to the name with the developer Mattel.

Discography

Albums

EPs

  • Lazy Days and Raunchy Nights EP (January 1, 2001)
  • LazyTown Sexcapades EP (June 4, 2002)
  • I Want to Sever Your Genitals and Make a Cake from Them EP (August 26, 2003)
  • Severed Genitals Remixed in a Blender EP (November 22, 2005)
  • Passed out drunk and naked EP(Jan. 2006)
  • Woke up Red and Raw EP(Feb. 2010)

Singles

from Sweet and Satanic

  • 2002 "Let Me Digest Your Sweet Vitae" #45 US, #145 UK
  • 2002 "Lazy Cannibalism" #101 US, #43 UK
  • 2003 "Say Goodbye To Your Head" #5 US, #25 UK
  • 2003 "Your Head Remixed in a Blender" #9 US, #41 UK

from I Love Happiness and Your Blood

  • 2004 "Joyful Happiness" #75 US #3 UK
  • 2005 "Hitler Sex" #134 US Modern Rock, #8 UK
  • 2005 "It's Time for a Murder Party" #10 UK
  • 2005 "Uh Oh...Who Wants to Die?" feat. Elmo #94 US, #2 UK
  • 2007 "Master of Masturbation" #37 US

from I Love How Your Fat Tastes

  • 2007 "Using Fat as Butter on Toast" #21 US
  • 2007 "Buttsecks" #22 US
  • 2007 "Grease Steph's Palm with your love juice" #3 US #1 UK
  • 2007 "Tennis Racket Masturbation" feat. Maria Sharapova #55 US

from We Can Bake a Satan Cake!

  • 2002 "My Knife in Your Ass" feat. Eminem #9 US, #3 UK
  • 2002 "Your Soul Served With a Bit of Cheese" #12 US, #100 UK
  • 2003 "I Created AIDS" #15 US, #2 UK
  • 2004 "Hooking is a Blast!" #1 Iraq Hot 100
  • 2004 "Split me in two and eat it raw!" #3 US #19 UK

from I Want Your Soul In My Tummy!

  • 2001 "Countdown to Your Death" #1 US
  • 2001 "Toe's with jam" #4 US
  • 2001 "Bacon,Labia and Testicle Sandwich" #1 US #3 UK
  • 2001 "Schoolgirl Steph's Slimy Slit Slurp" #2 US #8 UK
  • 2001 "Nick Jr.'s huge Cock" #4 US #10 UK

from Stephanie's 2 Dollar Panty Sale

  • "Do these smell?" #1 US #4 UK
  • "Panty lines around Steph's ankles!" #1 US #5 UK
  • "Crotchless pink Panties" #3 US #4 UK
  • "Undie's Cupcakes" #1 US #1 UK
  • "Pink icing on my pink.." #3 US #4 UK
  • "Mistress Stephanie"s Love Lick" #1 US #1 UK
  • "The odor of Steph's love" #3 US #10 UK
  • "It's a D.P Day !" #3 US #6 UK
  • "Spread my love on you're toast !" #3 US #4 UK
  • "Mistress Stephanie's Nasty Knicker's !" #1 US #5 UK
  • "Stinky Pink P...Y Party !" #1 US #1 UK
  • "Smell my Pussy and DIE!" #3 US #1 UK

from Death and the Cupcake

  • "Stephanie's Clitoris Clamp"#1 US #7 UK
  • "C4 Cupcake" #3 US #1 UK
  • "Faster StephyPuss' kill kill!"#1 US #3 UK
  • "Sandpaper Vibrator"#1 US #1 UK
  • "Behead me kiss Me" #1 US #8UK
  • "A Knife in every hole" Banned the world over!
  • "Arsenic Enema" #1 US #3 UK
  • "Today you die..Tonight I masturbate" #1 US #4 UK
  • "Ziggy Soup..Trixie steak" #9 US #7 UK
  • "Morphine Milkshake" #1 US #3 UK
  • "Stingy's Liver With Onion's" #1 US #9 UK
  • "Death Smell" Banned in Britain #3 US
  • "Douche of Dismemberment" this single was the last straw for the U.N. Producer Sporticus was hunted down and fed to rabid pit bulls Singer Mistress Stephanie escaped when she set off a low yield nuclear device hidden underneath LazyTown town square killing 2000 U.N.troops and completely devastating the town.She remains at large.

from I'm back, Bitch!

  • "Fuck the U.N...In the ass!"
  • "Piecekeeper..piecemaker..pieceeater!"
  • "Back in black magic"
  • "Got Radiation?"
  • "Pit bull on a stick"
  • "Barbecued Peace keepers Taste Delicious"
  • "Smell my Smell"
  • "Koffi Anan's my Bitch"
  • "Deep fried Pixel Penis"
  • "On You"re Knee's and Sniff!!"
  • "Orgytown,Cannibaltown
  • "Smellstephspussytown"
  • "Oil of Hole-A"

from Is This Legal?

  • "Roofie Supository"
  • "Ziggy Dildo"
  • "Smell my Finger Little Girl"
  • "Will You Be My Outhouse?"
  • "Underage Stephy Twat 5 Dollars"
  • "Sit on My Lap Little Girl"
  • "Dildouptheasstown"
  • "Genital vivesection YaY !"
  • "Testicle Bite and Swallow"
  • "Preteen Anal Rape"
  • "No Uncle I'm not wearing Panties"
  • "Stephanies Sex Tape 29.99"
  • "(I'm a) Unregistered Sex Offender!"
  • "Dont use no lube uncle"
  • "Whats the Vaseline for Daddy?

from Nuclear Nookie

  • "Barbecued Trixie Tits" #5 U.S #4 U.K
  • "Once you go pink you'll love Stephs stink" #7 U.S #1 U.K
  • "3 Plus 6 = 69" #1 U.K Banned in the U.S.
  • "Taste me in the Morning..Smell me At Noon" #1 U.S #1 U.K
  • "Pink Landing Strip"#6 U.S #6 Iraq
  • "But Officer I Am Registered!" #4 U.S #1 U.K
  • "Pink Haired Pedophile" #4U.S #1 Wales
  • "I Told You The Carpet Matched The Drapes!" #5 U.S #4 Wales
  • "Damn Right It Hurts!" #4 U.S #1 U.K
  • "I Know What The Vaselines For!" #1 U.S #1 U.K

from Whaddup, Bitchez?

  • "Boobiez" #11 U.K. Banned in the U.S.
  • "Haruhi (is the biggest mother f**ker alive because she dissed me)" #1 U.K. Reached Number #2 in U.S. before being boycotted by Haruhi Suzumiya fans.
  • "How I Long (To Do You)" #11 U.S. #1 U.K.
  • "Naked Drunk Co-Ed Seduction Ritual" #112 U.K. #22 U.S.
  • "Illegal Song" #14 U.S. #12 U.K.
  • "2 Exhausting 4 U" #33 U.S. #11 U.K.

Health Alert!

Kid1

A fat child after watching LazyTown.

The FDA has recently posted a warning that LazyTown can actually be VERY HAZARDOUS to a child's physical and mental well-being. The show depicts extremely graphic images of Kitten Huffing, buttsecks, homosexuality, & Satanism. Scientist Stephen Hawking has compared intake of LazyTown to the ingestion of lead paint, causing severe brain damage, drowsiness, and vomiting. A child can become mentally impaired and have a very odd, bruise-like mark on their forearms, due to rupturing arteries. Most episodes can also cause seizures if watched for more than twenty minutes, and watching more than one episode in the space of two hours can potentially cause unconsciousness and death. Al Gore created a documentary about the dangers of the show, though it was banned in Iceland.

File:AlGore test.JPG

The Attack on LazyTown

After getting wind of the happenings in LazyTown, the FBI finally decided to do something about all the unspeakable acts. On June 1, 2007, a massive police/militia raid took place in LazyTown. A squadron of police helicopters shot down Sluttygus's blimp, resulting in a huge Hindenburg-like explosion, incinerating Stingy's mansion. Fortunately, Stingy was uninjured, as he was escaping in his car towards safer ground. A 28-member SWAT team battered down Robby's door,resulting in the loss of all his kiddy porn and his eventual arrest. Sluttygus escaped to Germany and then to Finland and finally Italy, but the UN is working on finding him. As for Stephanie, she killed twenty officers and escaped to Denmark, where she decided to hide in Copenhagen Harbor, where The Little Mermaid statue is.Never one rest on her laurels she immediately made an entire girls soccer team her new "Bitches" with her Satanic Crotch pheromones and became the biggest sex slaver in Europe.Once established this "New Sodom" attracted all the dirtiest,nastiest,most depraved underage females on the continent to be her "Newage Nookie Neophites"once again bringing her fortune and infamy that was lost in the raid on her former compound. Ziggy was deprived of his sweets and sent to a mental hospital. Stingy, now legless, is fleeing across America. Pixel joined the American government briefly but was assassinated. Trixie went on the run too but was assassinated. The Mayor died protecting Stephanie and was buried by Mrs. Busybody who now lives alone in the abandoned Lazy Town with Waspinator.

A lil "Bigger" music video


Because [Lil Jon]'s crunk phenomenon has touched the many lives of this world, he now wants to make every song in the world crunk. This is no exception. Will the [United States] allow this? Surprisingly, yes. They think it is very educational to the children about the real world.

The Lost Episode

In the lost episode of Lazytown, Noob Saibot, and his genetic clone nOOOb Saibot, crash land on the island of Lazytown, and proceed to give all the people abortions. Hearing about this, Stephanie calls on her pirate friends to go do anal with the Saibots. At the point of penetration by Johnny Depp on Noob Saibot, nOOOb Saibot commits the highest form of coup, otherwise known as haiku, and ends up ramming his schlong so far up Stephanie's anal cavity, it creates a vortex, causing all SWG servers to revert to pre-NGE, much to the rejoicement of Jesus and Osama Bin Laden. Then he calls on all the hippos to police this new space-time continuousness that is called Star Wars Galaxys [[Lazytown Edition. All who subscribe are given a collectors kitten to huff, and offered the new starting profession of drama queen, which combines the powers of a jedi and an emo.

Trivia

Note: All the trivia below is about Stephanie. You've been warned!!!

  • Use of Stephanie's Dirty Panties in armed conflict is considered a Warcrime.
  • Stephanie literally kills people with kindness.
  • Hitler has been quoted to believe that Stephanie was, "A bit too harsh on the Jews".
  • Stephanie drinks Alucard's blood.
  • In 2004, Stephanie came in second place at the Miss Universe Competition. The winner was brutally penetrated by a rusted pitchfork with witnesses reporting a "furious ball of pink psychopathy" as the perpetrator.
  • Stephanie's parents came out of the closet to her.
  • Stephanie's virginity was never lost, it died in mysterious circumstances.
  • Pink may or may not be her natural hair colour. There is no way of confirming or denying as anyone who sees her dies.
  • Stephanie cuts the wrists of emos.
  • Jack the Ripper was really just Stephanie when she was pissed-off.
  • Stephanie's singing was used as a medieval torture device, which causedUltimate Suffering.
  • Stephanie and Oprah Winfrey had sex one night in June of 2003 and the video footage was discovered 2 seconds later by Nick Jr. It was played on Nick Jr. in between Blue's Clues and The Backyardiggans.
  • Adult Stephanie performing in a strip show with her undead minions.
  • Stephanie made Vaan her bitch. Then again, making Vaan your bitch isn't exactly hard...
  • Stephanie makes blood pudding from the menses of her newage nookie neophites
  • Vapors from Stephanie's pussy are a corrosive acid that will eat through human nose flesh
  • Recently,The U.N. imposed Economic Sanctions against the United States of America When it was learned that they had Acquired a vast arsenal of Stephanie's dirty panties still dripping with pussy poison and extremely shitfuck lethal as they have been designated as the worlds most deadly Biological weapon.
  • Stephanie once molested Chris Benoit with a strap-on and steroids.
  • Stephanie has only two weaknesses: the powerful Scimitar of the legendary Pirate-Ninja Kylapharos, and the Hyper Beam of Samus Aran. But since Kylapharos is her lieutenant in evil, she will not be destroyed by his power, and Samus is too busy fighting Zebesian Butt Pirates to worry about some 8-year-old in Iceland.#
  • Stephanie's parents are made out of plastic. sosias of hitler the antihero.
  • In 1999 Stephanie had a Three sum with Hitler and Osama Bin-ladin
  • Obi Wan trained Stephanie to use the Bing Bang before she betrayed him and turned to the Dark Side.
  • Her fun fashion sense makes her a trendsetter for Asian prostitutes everywhere.
  • Stephanie is just Brock from Pokemon in drag. You can tell (especially when Stephanie smiles) because they both have the same eyes.

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