Game Maker

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Game-Maker-Battle-Arena 2

How GML really works.

Game Maker is a Computer Games kitchen utensil created by former Arsenal footballer Mark Overmars, who lectures on the dangers of playing Computer Games, somewhere in Europe (location kept secret as it is rumoured that Microsoft is trying to get their hands on Game Maker to sell at an exorbitant price and cause even more crashes on thousands of PCs). Several different versions are available: a "lite" version for poor people, a "pro" version for people you can care about, and an all-powerful "staff" version which puts other Game Maker games to shame and causes much begging for an editable version to plagarise on the Game Maker forums.


Game Maker (which happens to be awesome) started like all computer software - crap and totally unheard of. Steadily things improved through several of the integers below ten up until Game Maker six. This is regarded by some as the finest Game Maker ever made. Which was true, as it was the latest one until Game Maker seven and the latest version is always best (see Indiana Jones: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull for example). Control of Game Maker has been passed on to a British company "Yo Yo Games" as the previous company had stuffed up the accounts making Game Maker look in the grey and could use room for improvement.

Making Games

Game Maker comes with an in-built drawing program so you can scribble while stealing sprites off the internet to claim as your own. A variety of different editing effects mean that no-one will ever know that the graphics aren't yours. Clicking a button will make your game playable and stops others from stealing your already stolen graphics and sounds. Doing this also makes the file size three times larger and causes a large red blob appear where your game should be. Which is also why Game Maker is awesome.

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How the most of the featured games are.

Yoyo Games

This place is pretty much Newgrounds only for Game Maker. Why? Because it has all the plagiarism, crappy mario/super smash bros clone submissions by 9-year-olds or []yourself[/url], and incomplete and hopeless projects that Newgrounds has. The only good things on yoyogames are made by the people who get their game featured or the staff, and those aren't even always up to par. All that it's missing is porn, but that feature will be released after they finally announce that the site is no longer in beta (how long has it been, like 4 years?).

According to legend, Yoyogames once dwelt in a "golden age," but that time, if it ever existed, is obviously long gone. The forums on the site are riddled with bugs and glitches. It can't even count how many posts there are right, and the buttons set up to report bad posts don't work (i.e. we don't care, those were just to make it feel more forum-y). Users typically last about five posts, sufficient to ask a question, get a crappy answer, and run the hell away from there.

See Also

WARNING!!-Most members on the gay sites listed below are anally retentive and enjoy wacking off to the sites. Most of them sell crack and look at little children. You have been warned.

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