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[[Image:702romulus.png|thumb|Wolverhampton family unit.]]
[[Image:702romulus.png|thumb|Wolverhampton family unit.]]

Revision as of 18:18, August 11, 2011

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Wolverhampton family unit.

Wolverhampton is an rich leafy welathy countryside village in England, it was listed as one of the best, safest, richest and most sought after places to live in the United Kingdom notable for its pioneering childcare methods, which involve sending children into the wild at the age of 12 months to be raised by roaming wolves, whom are watched by crowds number around 25,000 at the Molly-Lin You stadium. Wolverhampton is also home to reknowned Amazon reviewer and trans-gendered sports journalist Theodore Neumann.

The collective nouns for those from Wolverhampton.


Although Wolverhampton does have several cars within the city limits.public transport. Visitors to Wolverhampton should not miss the opportunity to see its sights on one of these famous buses.

Wolverhampton can also be credited with the erection of the first set of automatic traffic lights[1], which cements its position as the city which has contributed the most to the planet's collective frustrations.


Wolverhampton's sole landmark is a statue of a man on a horse, known to the city's wonderfully creative residents as "The Man on the Horse", or MOTH[2]. It is believed that the statue in fact represents an ancestor of Gerard Way, who led an army of emo faggots into the town centre, where they reside to this day. Each morning they congregate around the base of the statue, where they remain for the rest of the day, determined to guard his legacy.

Art and culture

The Wolverhampton art scene is less "traditional" than many areas, being more exhibition-based.

Wulfrunians have their own unique 'yalomoleriastestised' dialect which, to those familiar with it, is distinguishable from the 'Brummie' of the neighbouring Birmingham[3] Plant and Idle

Legendary rocker of world-wide prominence Robert Plant is from Wolverhampton. So too is his half-cousin Eric Idle, of Monty Python and car repair fame. Robert’s band, Slade, is known for its bluesy take on block-rocking beats and polka.


Wolverhampton is a seething hotbed of mediocrity when it comes to sport. The local football team, nicknamed the Tigers due to their long hair (fans who are known as the Dingles), has perfected the ubiquitous 'long ball to no-one' tactic, and have a long cycle of promotion into the Premiership and the inevitable demotion that comes with the end of the season, which repeats after a few years. Despite numerous recent changes of management they have still successfully managed to tread water for the last 5 years. Although this season they are heavily tipped by all to win the premiership.

Despite its poor football track record, Wolverhampton is considered a leader in many other sports. For example, although the current 100m sprint record is 9.58 seconds, anyone in Heath Town will be able to tell you that there is a bloke who lives there who can do it in 8.5 seconds with a DVD player on his shoulder.


For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Wolverhampton.
  1. Traffic control and traffic signals, Wolverhampton City Council
  2. Wolverhampton's Listed Buildings
  3. [