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January 20: Nobody Edit Uncyclopedia Day Or Else

  • 968 - An unknown English monk at Lindisfarne creates Uncyclopedia, a parody of the Domesday Book. It turns out to be the entire reason for Viking raids on the British Isles as they attempt to destroy it, having a hatred of Benny Hill and music hall skits in general.
  • 1209 - The Cathars, the first protestants, are massacred for holding a copy of Uncyclopedia. The book is last seen in the hands of Peter II of Aragon as he fights off Catholic crusaders. His baffling last words are, 'Farmer Browne hath foure fatte sheeps'.
  • 1492 - Columbus becomes president of America; he wins 1-0.
  • 1513 - Ponce de Leon arrives in Florida and finds tantalizing clues as to the whereabouts of Uncyclopedia with a map showing an Indian pointing with the inscription, 'Pull my finger.'
  • 1712 - Abdul Alhazred the Mad is lifted up in the air in broad daylight and is seen being eaten alive by an invisible force. His last words, 'AAAAAAAAA!', prove that he had knowledge of the elusive Uncyclopedia.
  • 1937 - The 20th Amendment is passed, forcing all presidental candidates to compete in a 100-meter dash to decide the primaries. Surprisingly, Franklin D. Roosevelt is the first president to win this event.
  • 1911 - Explorer Roald Amundsen finds traces of an ancient civilization at the South Pole that has apparently been recently destroyed over two fragmentary pages of Polish jokes from Uncyclopedia.
  • 1942 - The Nazi Party gives the final solution to the "Jewish question", though the Jews insist that they were just asking for directions.
  • 1990 - Dan Brown writes a thriller-type novel of the hunt for the legendary Uncyclopedia and is pursued by mysterious agents of unknown forces and is threatened with death for revealing its secrets. Despite that, the novel is sent to the publisher's slush pile and is never seen again.
  • 1992 - Governor Bill Clinton beats Paul Tsongas in the primaries. Investigations as to whether or not Clinton bit part of Tsongas's ear off in the final stretch are launched.
  • 2004 - Pinky and the Brain finally take over the world, and are then killed by Joe Cartoon in a blender.
  • 2005 - The near-mythic Uncyclopedia is released to the world in electronic form as part of the WikiLeaks program. However, jokes like 'Farmer Browne hath foure fatte sheeps' fail to make an impact. The Illuminati and the Mysterions start over again from scratch after taking the day off.
  • 2008 - No-one has edited Uncyclopedia! Until I just did. Oh shit.
  • 2009 - International Change Day. Citizens of the 'homeless undead'-ridden Californian cities get a day of reprieve from demands for change as the masses of change-hungry 'Zombos' are distracted by a change of power in Washington.
  • 2010 - Some n00b edits Uncyclopedia.

Today's featured picture

Hello kitty toilet

Hello Kitty getting her groove on.

Image Credit: IMBJR
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Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Logo Text Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes2 UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
Unbooks-logo notext UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable-logo-en vector notext Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity-logo-notext Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetialogo UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext UnCommons
Broken media repository

Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 32,310 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
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United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
W17x11 16666
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
W17x11 8364
W17x11 10392
W17x11 Unknown
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.

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